I've been a longtime sufferer of anxiety. I've felt it getting progressively worse over the years. Some highlights:


  • Woman, mid-40's, severe health anxiety
  • Diagnosed OCD, with an emphasis on hyper-responsibility/intense fear of doing someone harm
  • Fear of driving on highways, to the point that I can no longer do it. (And honestly, the pandemic has not helped me get any exposure.)


This has been decades. Over that time, I've tried a lot of tricks, read a lot of books, followed a few different philosophies. And here I am, still getting worse. Not only that, but I can feel my outlook becoming darker. More blue. Less hopeful - and despite all of the bad choices I've made in my life, I used to always feel at least hopeful.

I've been seeing a psychologist for two years, so I'll definitely be talking it over with him as well, but I'm wondering....how can I go about really, truly mastering myself? My thoughts turn to intense martial arts, or some sort of artistic endeavor, or changing something drastic. These little bits and pieces I've been doing over the years? Mindfulness here, exercising there, decreasing sugar here, journaling there... Nope, not working. I need an overall approach, something soul-deep, something with real teeth, with discipline, with proven mental and physical benefits.

Any thoughts or ideas?