Dad is coughing up black lumps of blood, awaiting results, absolutely terrified.

[JValentine]

Morning!

Thanks so much for thinking of me.

His appointment is 11.45am. So hopefully by 12.30 I will know whats going on.

Will update x

[JValentine]

Lung cancer, bottom of right lung, spread to liver, tiny dots on liver.

I am broken

[BlueIris]

I'm so very sorry. Will be keeping you in my thoughts.

[pulisa]

Lung cancer, bottom of right lung, spread to liver, tiny dots on liver.

I am broken

I am so sorry to hear this...but you are not broken. You are still there for your Dad who will need you now more than ever..How has he taken the news? How is he?

[JValentine]

I'm so very sorry. Will be keeping you in my thoughts.

Thanks Blueiris x

I am so sorry to hear this...but you are not broken. You are still there for your Dad who will need you now more than ever..How has he taken the news? How is he?

Taken it superbly. Macmillan nurse was there ready to support and he said "I was 80% sure I had it anyway. No point breaking down. I have never backed down from anything, I will take the treatment and still be here in 3 years!"

They said its not curable but it is treatable. I don't know the stage or if its aggressive. They were insistent it is treatable?

They are waiting for the rest of the results of the biopsies and oncology will see him in a month! A whole month?! So he thinks it's not that bad if they are happy for him to wait that long. They will know what treatment would be best for him by then.

I have 3 younger brothers and 1 is disabled but very able. Mum (separated) is telling him now, dad can't bring himself to tell him 😭 my middle brother couldn't even speak on phone. Very upset. My bigger brother finishes work at 5 then dad will tell him. We're all pretty young and im feeling a bit cheated.

That's life though hey.

[pulisa]

Your dad is a strong and brave man. It's treatable and that's the thing to focus on. Of course your brothers are going to be very shocked and distressed but your dad is in control of this and has obviously steeled himself for news like this.

Don't write him off. He sounds to me as though he's determined to keep going and take whatever treatment is offered in order to be there for you all for as long as possible. He's not broken..not by a long way. You aren't either.

[JValentine]

I'm certainly feeling very broken. The whole world upside down thing.

Oh god i've got to tell my son 😭

I just hope he can live with it for a few years yet. Yes he certainly is. They said they won't give him chemo, etc if he is not fit and well. He has nailed the mental strength part of theat so just the physical now.

[Carys]

I am so dreadfully awfully sorry to hear this, this is not the news that any of you wanted and how desperately 'unfair' for him to face the cancer along with the lung condition he already has. Cancer does feel like it turns the world upside down, but after the shock settles, after a few days, you will find the strength and resources within yourself to focus on the treatment plan he has and the living to be done. If it helps you to know, I have known people with secondary cancers (lung and liver both, which started in breast) who have lived a quality life for 3/4 years plus, actually longer, with oral chemo regimes. Theirs was also not curable, but treatable. You will have so much support from MacMillan as a family, and the NHS will be truly wonderful every step of the way, I have no doubt of that. Your Dad is fantastic, what a man, showing the way with the gift of positivity and courage he has, you will stand beside him on this journey, it will bring you closer together honestly. I say this to you now as somebody who had the priviledge of sharing the years of a terminal illness with my Dad, we had some of the best times in my life together during that period, we laughed the most and loved the most. You will too. You will feel broken today, thats ok, but tomorrow is a new day and your Dad will be here and you will process this slowly and come through it.

(I have actually shed a tear for you this afternoon - a stranger whose path has just crossed on an anonymous forum.)

[Scass]

I’ve kept up with your thread but not commented. Really sorry about the diagnosis. Wishing you strength and courage. You can do this, he’s bought you up well.


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[JValentine]

Hi Carys,

❤ Bless you, I have shed so many tears today I had no idea where the water is still coming from!

Thank you so very much for your wise words. Crying again.

I'll step up and stand with him through this. As I've always done with all my family. I am dreading seeing him poorly, with no hair etc. Not sure how ill be able to handle that, don't want him to see me sad etc. I'll cross that bridge when I come to it.

That is lovely to hear about people you know living 3-4 years plus. I truly hope Dad is the same.

Thanks for being with me through this. ❤