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Thread: Anxiety over children’s health

  1. #1

    Anxiety over children’s health

    Does anyone else’s health anxiety center around their kids? I know every parent worries about their kids. But what crosses the line? My kids can’t have a single symptom without me jumping to the worst conclusion. Headache, brain tumor. Tired, leukemia.

    Right now my 12 year old has knee pain for no known reason and I’m trying to talk myself out of taking her to the dr tomorrow bc I am convinced she has osteosarcoma.

    How do normal People deal with their kids aches and pains? Can people truly hear mom my head hurts without thinking it’s cancer? I can’t imagine how amazing it would be to not be consumed with these thoughts...

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jan 2017
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    1,832

    Re: Anxiety over children’s health

    Quote Originally Posted by MaggieD8 View Post
    Does anyone else’s health anxiety center around their kids? I know every parent worries about their kids. But what crosses the line? My kids can’t have a single symptom without me jumping to the worst conclusion. Headache, brain tumor. Tired, leukemia.

    Right now my 12 year old has knee pain for no known reason and I’m trying to talk myself out of taking her to the dr tomorrow bc I am convinced she has osteosarcoma.

    How do normal People deal with their kids aches and pains? Can people truly hear mom my head hurts without thinking it’s cancer? I can’t imagine how amazing it would be to not be consumed with these thoughts...
    As the child of a mother whose health anxiety was all about me, I urge you to try and find help for this! I'm 38 and my mother's anxiety still revolves around my (and my brother's) health to the point that I won't take her calls if I have so much as a stuffy nose because she'll notice immediately and start asking me all kinds of questions about why I "don't sound good." I know that your anxiety is a massive burden on you, but it can be absolutely oppressive to the people around you. I'm nervous right now about some bladder issues I'm having, but I've kept them a secret from my mom (the person I'd love to turn to when I'm scared) because she'll make me more afraid with her own anxiety.

    I'm not saying this to make you feel bad at all, but to hopefully help motivate you to treat your anxiety. I am certain my own health anxiety is a direct result of growing up being told every ache or pain I had could be catastrophic. This is probably why my anxiety is only focused on me and not my daughter. In fact, I think I overcompensate by downplaying every ache or pain she has so she doesn't worry. Worrying about myself is horrendous enough, so I can't imagine how horrible it would be to take on the worry of the people around you. I've had so much success with therapy over the past few years!

  3. #3

    Re: Anxiety over children’s health

    I have struggled with this as well!

    I have had health anxiety about myself, my spouse, and my children.

    I have a 3 year old and I freaked out for a few days after he complained about leg pain. My daughter, who is now six, was rushed to the ER one night after I found a few petechiae on her nose. These are a couple extreme examples. Usually I am able to keep my anxieties about them in check but sometimes it just....escapes. I try very hard not to let them know I am very worried and just tell them I want the doctor to look at whatever it is. I definitely do NOT want to transfer this anxiety disorder onto them!

  4. #4

    Re: Anxiety over children’s health

    Quote Originally Posted by MandaIsAnxious View Post
    I have struggled with this as well!

    I have had health anxiety about myself, my spouse, and my children.

    I have a 3 year old and I freaked out for a few days after he complained about leg pain. My daughter, who is now six, was rushed to the ER one night after I found a few petechiae on her nose. These are a couple extreme examples. Usually I am able to keep my anxieties about them in check but sometimes it just....escapes. I try very hard not to let them know I am very worried and just tell them I want the doctor to look at whatever it is. I definitely do NOT want to transfer this anxiety disorder onto them!
    It’s comforting to know I’m not alone. It’s just so all consuming. I wish I could enjoy my children more. My husband is the least anxious person I’ve ever met so he gets frustrated with a lot :(

  5. #5

    Re: Anxiety over children’s health

    Ugh....definitely me. I spent two years worrying that my son had a brain tumor after he was diagnosed with migraines. I was hyper aware of every physical sensation he even hinted at. It was exhausting. He is 17 now and seems to be fine ( his headaches have even decreased), but I cannot shake the anxiety over his health.

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Oct 2016
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    4,185

    Re: Anxiety over children’s health

    Me too.

    I’ve posted about it before I think. I find it hard to apply cbt to it.


    Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

  7. #7
    Join Date
    May 2014
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    537

    Re: Anxiety over children’s health

    Gosh, I can’t agree you with more. My son has been having nosebleeds for the past months. He’s 6. His nose is prone to nosebleeds and it’s been happening since he was 18 months old. For the past month it has increased to almost daily, sometimes twice. It’s never been hard to stop and the rational part of me tells me that’s it’s just allergy season and allergens can dry out the nose but the irrational part of me is of course jumping to insane conclusions. Anyway, I don’t let it get to him. He used to panic about the bleeding but I break it down for him and tell him it’s just capillaries breaking and causing blood to come out. I tell him matter of factly that it’s just a dry nose. I keep calm and collected because I don’t want to transfer my anxiety on to him. I can already see that just like me he is prone to anxiety as well. So I stay there with him but I have him take the tissue and stop the bleed himself. I’m not saying this to be pretentious, I am simply telling you this because we know how hard health anxiety can be to live with, we can’t transfer that burden on to our children.

    My children are my life and I often have a hard time dealing with my anxiety surrounding their health. My daughter actually has a serious heart condition that will require open heart surgery. I’ve known since she was 1. She’s 5 now. This is the year that they usually conduct the surgery. I try not to think about it and strangely enough I have done barely any googling on it. The docs found it, diagnosed her and told me that it’s not to worry and the surgery will cure her. I believe them and I just keep faith in God. But yeah that aspect of health anxiety is so painful when it comes to kids.

  8. #8

    Re: Anxiety over children’s health

    Quote Originally Posted by MaggieD8 View Post
    It’s comforting to know I’m not alone. It’s just so all consuming. I wish I could enjoy my children more. My husband is the least anxious person I’ve ever met so he gets frustrated with a lot :(
    I could have written this myself...had to check I hadn't. It is SO all consuming. I noticed a week ago tomorrow that my 3.5 year old son had swollen glands on the back of his head toward the bottom and at first I just figured it was due to a black fly bite or something but then he got a fever the other night and today I found a single (what looks like) petechiae on his butt today and I am trying not to completely lose it. I brought him to urgent care the other night and they thought it was viral but there is ALWAYS that doubt.

    My husband doesn't worry about anything and it's frustrating for me.

    I also wish I could enjoy my children more...as well as just enjoying life but everything has just been too much lately.

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