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Thread: My anxiety is being triggered

  1. #11
    Join Date
    May 2021
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    Re: My anxiety is being triggered

    To be honest very little - except for the bulking agent. But when he thought it was gallstones he switched to a low fat diet with simple and plain foods and it helped the pain an awful lot.

    Last night wasn't great for him, he was up and down like a yoyo with the pain. So this morning he's been on a mission to try and sort the colonoscopy. He tried the hospital to see where he was on the list but couldn't get through. Then he tried the GP but was in a queue so gave up. He's now looking at a private colonoscopy which he says will be about 1500. He's self employed, not working because of the pain, fortunately he has a bit of savings which can pay for it.

    He's very down about it this morning and now thinks the dr just latched onto diverticulitis and she didn't really know.

    I'm trying really hard to be pragmatic about it and say that he improved he symptoms by changing his diet before so it's worth sticking with that. I'm trying hard not to spiral into anxiety, worrying that it will get like it was the other week ago when he was lying on the floor screaming in pain, ambulance rides, desperate trips to the GP etc. But it's not easy - I feel like it's a whisker away from it all the time.

    Also when I spoke to my stepdad (my mum died at the beginning of feb, followed 2 weeks later by my Stepgran) on the phone last night, he was in a really low mood and very anxious. I'm meeting him for coffee this afternoon. I'm not in a good place to help him at the moment either. So strongly advised him to seek help from his GP and to contact Cruise etc re counselling.

    Trying not to take on other peoples stuff, it isn't good for me at the moment.

    Good news is that I have been accepted onto a local NHS CBT course to help me relearn to not worry about what I can't control and help with the anxiety. Slight downside is that there's a 6 week waiting list.

  2. #12
    Join Date
    Jun 2014
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    Re: My anxiety is being triggered

    Surely when he went to A&E they would have sussed out the possible diverticulitis and certainly anything more worrying?

    Actually a 6 week wait isn't bad..I know it's long enough but I've known it far worse. There's plenty of stuff online you can have a look at in the meantime though and of course there is plenty of information about self-help on NMP.

  3. #13
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    Re: My anxiety is being triggered

    They mentioned it at A&E as a possible cause. They checked his vital signs and did a blood test - all normal. It seems very much now if you aren't at deaths door you get sent home as quickly as possible.

    I didn't think it was too bad with a 6 week wait either, I asked her to send me some stuff I could work through prior to it starting too. Which hopefully will help.

  4. #14
    Join Date
    Jun 2013
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    Re: My anxiety is being triggered

    Really glad the doctor is taking it seriously. Has it made a difference to your husband or has it worried him more?

    You sound really sensible, I hope the CBT is helpful.
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  5. #15
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    May 2021
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    Re: My anxiety is being triggered

    To be honest last night he was OK with it. Today after more pain and not a lot of sleep he's incredibly anxious about it. I have tried to reassure him that nothing showed up on the ultrasound or MRI that was serious- which is good and that his symptoms improved the other week when he cut out fat/light diet and they have come back when he ate crap. So today he went up to the higher dose of lansoprazol and has had some porridge and some soup. Also he has had no anti-inflammatories today because if it is diverticulitis they won't help that.

    To be honest I'm not sensible, I'm currently only just managing to keep myself stable.

  6. #16
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    Re: My anxiety is being triggered

    Ok so with the new diet/no anti-inflammatories/increased lansoprazole my husband seems to have had a better night. He isn't up yet, but was only up a couple of times in the night for a pee. So fingers crossed.

    For me, still anxious this morning. I made the decision to visit work today with a view to phased return next week. I thought if I just popped in for a visit it might take some of the scariness out of going. Fingers crossed.

  7. #17
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    Re: My anxiety is being triggered

    He's up and about, has a bit of a back ache. But tummy seems to have been good.

    He's now insistent about reducing his lanzoprazole back down to his normal level. Even though it seems to have helped.

    Meanwhile, I've been getting increasingly anxious about my phased return to work next week. I had a call from someone I work with last night that my team lead is leaving, she's been very supportive and I don't want her to go. I guess it's a fear of the unknown, it means a new boss and with all the upheaval/anxiety of late it's set me off all of a twitter. I guess my confidence is at a low ebb and I don't want anything rocking the boat on any progress I make, although today I'm not sure I've made any.

    As well as my main job, I also do a day doing private work. I'd built up a regular client list and at the moment the thought of seeing them is completely freaking me out. I've had to cancel the last few Fridays because of Mike and then my anxiety. So I've made a decision. I've kind of compromised with myself. I'm going to cut my caseload in half, well probably more than half, and I'm just going to do a half day a week, when I'm feeling up to it. I've already contacted a few people today and told them I can't see them anymore. The last 18 months I feel like I've been stretched to the limit. I've been chasing my tail.

  8. #18
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    May 2021
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    Re: My anxiety is being triggered

    Well I ventured out of the house.to work. I was an anxious wreck and I cried, even though I swore to myself I wouldn't. The girls there were lovely though.

    But after that I went to the supermarket and bought my husband so probiotics. I know how to treat a man!

  9. #19
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    Jun 2014
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    Re: My anxiety is being triggered

    Going back to your workplace must have been very emotional for you and it took courage to do it. I hope that it has helped to give you confidence that you can cope though. You've been in a bad place but are coming out the other side at your own pace and have realised that you were just taking on too much at a very challenging time when you were dealing with so much pain in your personal life.

  10. #20
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    May 2021
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    Re: My anxiety is being triggered

    I'm not sure if it has made me feel better about going back.

    I seem to have gone into a real slump this afternoon. I've felt really anxious all day and now it's the end of the day and I feel exhausted.

    I spoke to my stepdad before and he wasn't in a good way either. Today I feel like I'm failing, that the mountain is too hard to climb. I know that tomorrow is another day and it could be better than today, I just am so full of self doubt.

    I feel like the things that made me anxious in the first place are still there and I'm frightened that I won't cope with them.

    I need someone to give me a hug and tell me everything is going to be alright.

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