Re: Constant health scares, looking for advice.
Originally Posted by
vcamp90
I'm looking for reassurances here and similar experiences you've dealt with and any tips on how to cope would be really appreciated, thank you guys.
I had a mental breakdown with my health anxiety but I got through it though and I'm out the other side..
Tips?
Therapy.
Elimination of stimulants in the diet. (body has enough stress hormones going on from our fear)
Relaxation techniques - especially deep breathing.
Understanding the stress response and how the body reacts exactly the same whether it's a sabre toothed-tiger coming at me or my imaginary diagnosis of cancer, MS, strokes, heart attacks - whatever.
But the most important tip I can give you is acceptance.
Acceptance that life means uncertainty and the only certain thing is eventual death. That's a cert - a definite. It's non-negotiable. And illness is a probability for most of us..
Death and dying applies to every living thing on the planet, and for humans - that little dash between our birth and death is our story to write in response to life. We're given the plot but our response is something that we can control or at least work on for a better outcome.
The problem with HAers is that they're constantly time-travelling to a fearfully imagined future - immediate or otherwise - and that means that they're not living - they're existing. They mistake common (and not so common) anxiety symptoms for disease. Stress causes a lot of anxiety symptoms (literally hundreds) and so there are always symptoms. It's a bit like the game 'Whack a Mole' where you whack one mole and another pops up? Same with health anxiety. You deal with one symptom and another pops up - only you've never had this one before. It's different, therefore your mind tells you that 'this time, there is something terribly wrong with you'. But the tests will come back clear and the word 'anxiety' keeps cropping up in the GP surgery (and hospitals) but the HAer can't accept that there's nothing seriously wrong with them because they feel so ill. It 'feels like they're dying' - even though they have no experience of dying? The doctors have missed something? The tests were wrong? Google concurs with their diagnosis, so why not actual doctors?
I managed to climb out of the rabbit hole the night before I had a colonoscopy which I was 100% certain would reveal bowel cancer. That night I decided to accept whatever was coming my way and I felt calm for the first time in years. I simply slid over from the passenger seat into the drivers seat and took hold of the wheel, and this was much better because HA drives like a dickhead!
Of course, there was no cancer. Turns out I had one of the best looking colons in Britain - which goes to show how much of a dick the human mind can be!
But it works the opposite way too..
I thought my way into mental breakdown so I had to think my way out again, and I did. But I didn't do it by avoidance or trying block HA thoughts out. No. I let them all come, but stopped reacting with fear. I observed them and saw them for what they were - just thoughts, not reality. I worked on lowering my stress hormones by doing the above and I worked on accepting that I can't control anything in life except my response.
Health anxiety is a horrible disorder. It's all-consuming and exhausting. It's life ruining, and for our families as well as us. It's like we're running from something all the time and our heart rates are constantly high - even when we're at rest. This is because our minds are still sprinting away which releases more adrenalin etc.
If we can stop, turn around and look at what it is we're running from - we will see that there's nothing there. The monster, beast, or gremlin exists only in our minds. It's not real but our brain doesn't know that - which is why the fight or flight response is always triggered, and we have the ability to physically turn that off by deep breathing. If we think of a happy memory, our body will release feel-good hormones, and it doesn't matter if all we can manage is a few seconds a day - what matters is that we understand that this is something we can all control to some extent. Some people will be able to be cured of this disorder; others, like me, will always need to maintain control by doing what we know works..
So far this year I've had two health concerns and I've yet to go back down that hole, so my HA is being managed and that's the best I can hope for - and I accept it.
Effort
We can throw meds at HA and settle into a medicated existence (complete with side-effects) which will take the edge of the symptoms but this won't deal with the disorder itself or how we came to develop it. That'll be waiting for us when the GP takes us off the pills..
Or we can decide to graft our way back to mental health.
Some of us have no choice because we can't take meds, (chemical sensitivity etc) and that's been my story.
Some people need meds to get them in a more receptive place for therapy to be effective, but therapy must be part of the plan if health anxiety is to be controlled in any meaningful and lasting way. Some people on here obviously want the quick fix. They want to feel better but are not prepared to put the work in, so they suffer on and a million threads later they're still here. I go into depth with most of my posts but I do know that with some people - all they want is tea and sympathy - and this has a place, don't get me wrong, but reassurance and sympathy - alone - won't make HA go away.
In my case, I had developed fibromyalgia so those symptoms were being thrown into the mix, but I've lived with someone who had a breakdown with their HA and they were physically well. So I understand, completely, how devastating (and convincing) HA can be.
Every night I used to go to sleep (I say sleep, I had insomnia and woke up after an 30 minutes) and I'd worry about what was happening inside my body. I visualised rusty pipes and leakages and tumours. Now I thank it for doing such a great job in keeping me alive because I know that it's constantly healing and repairing itself and that cells are dying and being replaced all the time. Fight or flight is my body keeping me alive - just as it's meant to - it just feels really unpleasant when I'm at rest and not running away. But, thanks to deep breathing, I can shut that down within a minute now and in doing that I'm giving something back to my body. I now visualise the inside of my body as looking fabulous. Gleaming pipes, and no leakages - well, there's a slight leakage when I laugh or sneeze but that's heaving out massive babies for ya!
This is my long-drawn out way of saying that recovery from HA is down to us and us alone. NO amount of reassurance on here will help because it's a short term fix to a long term problem. Put the work in, and you can show HA who is boss, for sure!
Hopefully you'll find something useful in my ramblings?
All the best.
Last edited by NoraB; 30-07-21 at 07:51.
Reason: Comma culling
__________________
A thought is harmless unless we believe it.