HI all

I have been suffering with bloating, nausea and like a gnawing pain for about 5 weeks now and it feels like it is getting worse especially the nausea at night. I am on no meds at the moment, Omeprazole did not agree with me so I am just suffering at the moment. I know the right thing to do is to have the endoscopy , my GP made an urgent referral for me as she knew how much it is affecting me alongside of my health anxiety which is crippling at the moment, I live on my own dont really have any meaningful support and i am feeling wretched and hopeless. I dont want the sedative as I am scared of the implications of this and not being in control. I also dont what my throat numbed as i know this will make me panic about my breathing as i wont be able to feel it , would rather not have the numbing spray or sedative but the thought of the procedure horrifies me!! Please can anyone help I am desperate..