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Thread: So fed up with HA

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Feb 2018
    Posts
    417

    So fed up with HA

    Hi everyone,

    I am so fed up of being this way. I managed to go through lockdown without any worries and you would think that something as big as covid would send my HA spiralling but it absolutely didn’t. It was the longest time I’d gone without HA. Now I’m a mess. Constantly worrying. First it was anxiety over my smear (came back fine), moved onto my breast in particular ibc (don’t have, breasts are fine)
    I’m now obsessed with my gum. I have a partially erupted wisdom tooth that’s causing the gum to be sore over it, when I had a look (wish I hadn’t) I could see a very small white area on it, I immediately panicked and thought of oral cancer!! What the heck is wrong with me?! It’s obviously something to do with by wisdom tooth but I’m sitting here freaking out about oral cancer and worrying like mad. The next thing I felt a spot on my nose I’ve convinced myself this is some kind of skin cancer on my nose!! The spot has a head but because it’s on the rim of my nostril I’m telling myself this is not normal and must be cancer! Why is my mind like this?!
    I’ve started back on meds again sertraline and I know this can make anxiety worse before it gets better but I feel like I’m going insane and all the happiness in my world has been zapped away. I don’t know what to do with these all consuming thoughts.
    I am going to make a dentist appointment tomorrow morning because my gum has been hurting on and off for the past year and I feel like the tooth needs taking out. I haven’t been for a dental checkup in well over a year because of covid so I’m due a checkup anyway. Hopefully this will put my mind at ease with my gum worries but then I know once that worry is gone it will move onto the next thing. I need it to stop, I’ve been to CBT before twice in fact and each time it’s not helped. Having to go over past worries and fears just made me worry about them all over again. The meds work for me in terms of taking the feelings of anxiety away such as heart beating fast, feeling sick and panic attacks but it also leaves me feeling quite numb like I have no feelings I even find it hard to cry when on them.
    Any one found any other techniques to deal with HA?

  2. #2
    Join Date
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    Re: So fed up with HA

    Have you read the sticky threads in this forum - there are loads of tips etc in there.
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  3. #3
    Join Date
    Nov 2011
    Posts
    258

    Re: So fed up with HA

    Hi I could have written this thread myself and I’m sorry I have no good advice for you as I too cannot get out of this spiral over the last 18months I too have had unfounded breast cancer worries skin cancer worries and am currently suffering really bad anxiety awaiting a urine test coming back after my second uti in a month obviously I’ve googled relentlessly and have been worried about diabetes kidney and liver disease I have suffered with health anxiety for over ten years have had countless rounds of various therapy and I’m still like this it’s relentless and debilitating I hope you find a way out of this spiral

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Aug 2013
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    24,667

    Re: So fed up with HA

    Quote Originally Posted by nomorepanic View Post
    Have you read the sticky threads in this forum - there are loads of tips etc in there.
    I know right? So many resources and 1000's of threads of advice. Makes you wonder eh?

    FMP
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  5. #5
    Join Date
    Mar 2016
    Posts
    4,918

    Re: So fed up with HA

    Quote Originally Posted by AnxietyGirl30 View Post
    I’ve started back on meds again sertraline and I know this can make anxiety worse before it gets better but I feel like I’m going insane and all the happiness in my world has been zapped away.
    Meds just dumb down the anxiety symptoms. They don't address the real problem which is your irrational thinking.

    I’ve been to CBT before twice in fact and each time it’s not helped.
    A lot of things don't work first time. CBT didn't work for me first time.

    How much did you engage with therapy? Did you do what many people do, which is to try things for a week or two and give up they don't get immediate results?

    How many books on anxiety did you read?

    Have you ever educated yourself on the stress response (which is responsible for all those 'scary' symptoms)

    Anxiety podcasts?

    How hard have you tried to gain control over your HA - given that the easiest thing is to do nothing.

    Attending CBT sessions just ticks a box if you do not fully engage and put into practice what you've learned.

    What have you done to help yourself in other ways, as in diet (removing stimulants) sleep hygiene and choosing to do relaxing things?

    The meds work for me in terms of taking the feelings of anxiety away such as heart beating fast, feeling sick and panic attacks but it also leaves me feeling quite numb like I have no feelings I even find it hard to cry when on them.
    That's the problem with meds. Medication totally shut me down and given that I have emotional dysregulation (overly emotional) that was quite the contrast, and not one I cared much for. Plus, it didn't solve my problem.


    Any one found any other techniques to deal with HA?
    This forum is packed with tips & techniques in dealing with HA. You just need to look for them.

    With respect, this is what I mean about folk wanting the easy fix with HA and this is as good an example as any..

    I'm sorry that you're struggling. I empathise completely but there is a way of of this and it starts and ends with you and how determined you are to be out of the hole you're in.

    There's no time limit. No magic wand-wafting. Just hard work and determination.
    __________________
    A thought is harmless unless we believe it.

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Nov 2018
    Posts
    7,747

    Re: So fed up with HA

    Just want to talk about this from the point of view of somebody who's chosen meds. I'm on a relatively low dose, and even when I've had blips I've always resisted increasing my dose.

    With that said, they've saved my sanity.

    HOWEVER, they're just a part of something larger - attending CBT when offered and doing the homework, checking in with myself and others if I think I'm being irrational, and reminding myself to practice self-care. I'm in the middle of a bit of a blip right now, and I'm making a conscious effort to address and acknowledge my feelings so they won't find an outlet I don't want - a massive HA flare, for instance.

    I don't feel numb. I still cry, sometimes - most recently at a sad piece of sculpture I get scared, too, but the difference is that the fear mostly doesn't paralyse me and I can mostly still function.

    It's not just about the health anxiety specifically, it's about accepting that your thought patterns aren't rational and learning to consciously replace them with something more sensible.

    As Nora says, there's no miracle cure, just finding ways to work with it so that you can live your life.
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  7. #7
    Join Date
    Jun 2021
    Posts
    84

    Re: So fed up with HA

    Hi @AnxietyGirl. I feel your struggles and relate to them so well. I remember reading your stories when you were going through the smear test and I related as I had the same issues when I was going through my mammogram. I really think it's what set my HA off so dramatically over the 6 years ago. Most recently I have seen therapists, my doctors and even now a naturopath. My naturopath gave me a ton of advice and when I went back after a week and she asked me what I had done, I said 'nothing' and realized that I wasn't implementing anything, but expected my HA to change. So all that to say, I think we need to really commit to seeing changes, if we are expecting anything to change. Since your symptoms are moving around all over the body, you should feel confident that this is really anxiety talking, and that nothing is wrong. A few good books I found to help are Dare and Untangle Anxiety. Getting outside, committing to some sort of exercise, drinking a lot of water. All of these things help, we just have to take the first step. Thinking of you!!!

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