Symptom first, panic after?

[jude]

Hello everyone,

I have been reading Claire Weekes book and came across a symptom that I get really intensly:

Quote:(Hope Im allowed to do this)

''The person develops a consciousness of himself-of his thoughts, actions-which bewilders, alarms and exhausts. He feels imprisoned within himself and makes the mistake of stuggling to be free, trying to force self-forgetfulness.''

This feeling/thought actually causes a panic attack, not caused by it.
Does this make sense to anyone. The feeling terrifies me, especially when its really intense.
I just dont understand Why it happens. If it was caused by panic, then surely the panic would come first!

I feel as though I need to 'jump' out of my own mind, but cant. Then I think that Im going to be trapped like this forever and it makes me panic.

Does anyone else get this. If so, can u tell me how I stop it, or should I just try to 'go with it'[Sigh...]

Thanks

Jude x

[Meg]

Hi Jude,

Yes very common and fine to quote.

Lets take depersonalization - the first time it happens it often comes on fairly suddenly when you're in a difficult or stressful situation or exhausted.
You suddenly don't feel right and try to analyse what it is thats wrong - you come up with feel unreal or being off the planet and then you freeze -- eek-- whats all this about- when you cannot understand it or find a reason, then your mind whirls seeking a solution and in the process often spirals down into a panic attack.

We always panic as a result of something - a trigger, a particular smell, our thoughts, a chemical imbalance, an illness.

Our adrenal glands have to be sent a message from somewhere to tell them to release the mix of chemicals which cause the panic symptoms. They don't have a mind of their own so need to be instructed in some way.






Meg
www.anxietymanagementltd.com

You cannot conquer fear until you have learned what it is you're afraid of. The enemy is ignorance. Vivian Vance

[jude]

Hi Meg,

I was really fed up this morning. Iv been feeling better for the last few days, but when I got into bed last night and switched off the light this feeling hit me completely out of the blue. I tried to stay calm and ride the panic, but it seemed to get deeper and deeper. In the end I was in a right state.
I got up this morning still feeling a little odd, and made myself worse because I coulnt find anything absorbing enough to take my mind off it.

I thought I was coping so well until today. I feel as if Iv been kidding myself that I was getting better.

I hate this illness.

Jude x

[JPF]

Hi Jude

Yes, the same for me as ever - a totally vicious cycle.

Depersonalisation and morbid thoughts are the worst factors for me - I get into a spiral of "What if?" - "Why?" - "How?" on all the big questions of the universe and creation and then I panic and feel totally trapped inside my own body (which doesn't always seem real either!)

Weird, horrible and hard to describe!

Fear of the fear is something which seems to keep setting it off.

Without sounding even stranger than I already do, I once had a strange 'mystical' experience.. it was on a hill in the West Country (not Glastonbury) and I won't bore you with the details but returning to the spot some time after and expecting something to happen again I was very disappointed when it didn't.. However, as I was leaving the place feeling quite downcast I'm almost certain I heard a voice pop into my head and say "Don't think, just be."

I've never heard 'voices' before or since and whether it was something 'mystical' or my own subconscious it's good advice.. I think we all think too much, about ourselves and the condition and the dwelling on what scares us (if we can even identify it, aside from the common feeling of impending doom we all seem to get) and I think it just adds fuel to the fire.

You and I have discussed whether the Claire Weekes 'go with the thought' method works and I still stick by the claim that it doesn't suit me! If I can distract myself and stop the thought process I feel better.. If I go with the thoughts, even though I accept they're not actually going to kill me or make the universe unravel somehow, I feel bad and have another 'memory' to look back on in my collection of 'bad moments' - more fodder for panic attacks in my opinion.

Horses for courses! Whatever works for you, this is just my ha'peth!

I suppose I'd better put my white robes on and go back to channelling higher consciousness dolphin communications from the constellation of Tiodi

New Agedly

J

[jude]

Hiya J,

What would I do without you. I know that you will always talk some sense into this muddled up mind of mine.
Im beginning to agree with you about Claire Weekes' theory of siiting through it. I just cant do it. It just makes it worse and I get deeper and deeper.
Now the kids are home from School and they have taken my mind off things I feel much better. I feel Iv been wallowing in it all day, not facing it.
Thanks J. Your a real mate.
Jude x

[sal]

Hi Jude

Know how you feel and have been through it.

It feels like you will never get out of the thought pattern and the thoughts get stronger and more believeable but they do get to the stage when you realise they are thoughts and not actions.

It has taken me so long to believe that and when i feel anxious i still forget and believe they are actions and not thoughts.

It is scary thinking that anxiety can make you feel such a bad person but you know on this site you are not alone and how you feel is quite normal to all of us.



Lots of Love Sal xxxxx