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Thread: Watching and waiting

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jan 2016
    Posts
    387

    Watching and waiting

    I noticed a new dark mark (thought maybe itís a new mole) on my bottom lip. I sent a photo to the dr just over a week ago who said she thinks itís best to watch and wait. Take a photo and take another in 3 weeks and see if thereís any changes.

    Iím struggling so much with this. Iíve googled so many different things and of course my brain focuses on the worst. I donít think itís changed in the last week and a half.

    The mark is about 1mm x 1mm so I keep telling myself IF it is anything serious it will have been found early and hopefully be pretty easy to deal with.

    How do you deal with watching and waiting because itís honestly making me feel awful

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jun 2021
    Posts
    55

    Re: Watching and waiting

    "watching a waiting" is the worst thing for someone with HA to hear, I think, it sets off all sorts of brain weasels
    Normally I'd suggest limiting any checking (in this case looking at your lip) but this seems complicated by, oh, I dunno, the existence of mirrors?! I really feel for you...
    I think the best way forward is to remind yourself that it's not especially likely that this new tiny mole IS anything to worry about; that even if it were, it's really likely entirely curable because it's currently very, very tiny.

    And, if it's any consolation, I have an exactly identical mark, acquired in adulthood, and it's done nothing since it appeared.
    (I will now resist the urge to go look at it in a mirror to confirm this...)

    Best wishes to you, truly. But I think you're going to be just fine.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Jan 2016
    Posts
    387

    Re: Watching and waiting

    Quote Originally Posted by kyllikki View Post
    "watching a waiting" is the worst thing for someone with HA to hear, I think, it sets off all sorts of brain weasels
    Normally I'd suggest limiting any checking (in this case looking at your lip) but this seems complicated by, oh, I dunno, the existence of mirrors?! I really feel for you...
    I think the best way forward is to remind yourself that it's not especially likely that this new tiny mole IS anything to worry about; that even if it were, it's really likely entirely curable because it's currently very, very tiny.

    And, if it's any consolation, I have an exactly identical mark, acquired in adulthood, and it's done nothing since it appeared.
    (I will now resist the urge to go look at it in a mirror to confirm this...)

    Best wishes to you, truly. But I think you're going to be just fine.
    Thank you so much for your reply. I felt like I was going crazy yesterday for thinking and feeling the way I do. Iíve made a deal with myself that Iíll only check it now in the car, daft but the light makes it easier to see and Iím only in the car twice a day so it should stop me constantly checking.

    Itís reassuring to know you have a similar mark. I know we shouldnít seek reassurance on here but sometimes other peoples words and experiences really do help.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Jun 2021
    Posts
    55

    Re: Watching and waiting

    That's a great idea, to only check in the car.
    Don't get too hung up on being a "perfect" HA self-helper/patient. If it were easy to banish HA, we'd have all done that by now (well, nearly all of us, some people here probably have other overlapping personal(ity) problems that complicate tackling their HA -- there's hard roads and then harder roads, for sure.)
    But the way I look at is that hearing at least one "I grew a new mole in adulthood and it was absolutely nothing bad" story for every "I suddenly developed melanoma and died" story in the media isn't reassurance. It's REALITY!!! And hence it's perfectly appropriate for this space.

    Also sorry for typos in previous post, too, I am a terrible typist.

    Best wishes and don't get in the car more than you have to, haha!

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Jan 2016
    Posts
    387

    Re: Watching and waiting

    Thank you again. Iím feeling better about it today I keep reminding myself you only hear bad stories no one ever has anything to say about anything good.

    Iím going spend the weekend only checking in the car then from Monday only checking when leaving home and that should take me up until I have to contact my dr again a week Tuesday. Iím 100% sure it hasnít grown in the 10 days Iíve been checking so that got to be good right?!

    I read you previous post at 3.30am so hadnít noticed any typos just comforting words that helped me sleep 🙂

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