Very scared - pancreatic cancer worries

[greeneyedgirl]

I'm updating my symptoms to try help me to think positively. I have my ultrasound this Friday and then a follow up GP appointment next Tuesday.

+ Supraclavicular lymph node is fluctuating and, at some points, not there at all.
+ No pain in the lymph node.
+ No sciatica.
+ No head pain.
+ No pale bowel movements.
+ I feel like I can swallow and breathe properly again.

- Popping/moving internal sensation is back (I have lost weight due to not eating properly so whatever that may have been held in place by internal fat may now be allowed to move).
- Pain after eating, which is in left abdomen and sometimes at the top of my stomach.
- Pain increases at night in left abdomen.
- Pressure under left rib (like a marble) in bed at night.
- Back pain is limited to left side in line with the left abdomen pain.
- IBS type bowel movements have continued.

I am hoping that it is nothing more than IBS but can't get the fact that I have this moving/popping sensation and all of this pain, which is so concentrated to the left side under my rib, out of my head. Perhaps it is a pancreatic cyst?

[Siffi]

Good luck with your ultrasound appointment, sounds to me like gastritis/IBS I have that and it's almost similar to what you have (pain in the lymphnode area, pressure under rib, pain after eating, back pain due to stomach issues). The moving/popping could be stomach gases I have that sometimes When the stomach gets irritated, the diaphragm gets irritated and you get referred pain in the area of the supraclavicular lymphnode. The supraclavicular lymphnode is located quite deep above the clavicle (almost underneath) are you sure the lump is there? Usually feels like a hard pea if affected by cancer, not squishy, if that helps. Wishing the best, try to relax and focus on something else. Try not to overthink it.

[greeneyedgirl]

Hi Siffi - Thank you for your message. It really helped me to read it before I went to bed last night!

I then had the most awful night of pain imaginable. However, I had had a couple of glasses of wine last night, as my husband was away with work and I was nervous about going to bed feeling anxious and alone so I thought I would take the edge of it. I thought wrong, as the pain was awful and all over my upper abdomen including into the right side.

I have to be honest, I'm really not sure about the lump/lymph node. The first GP felt it when I went and said that it didn't feel particularly like a lymph node, as it wasn't hard and pea-like (exactly like you say). It has been up and down and sometimes I can't find it. This morning I can find it, as it is back up again. It's difficult to tell what texture it is, as it rolls around a lot and I'm trying to grasp it between my fingers. On the odd time that I manage to get it, it does feel a bit hard but not really hard! The second GP in Out of Hrs said that she couldn't feel anything but that was at night time. I find that it is more prominent on a morning and shrinks back as the day goes on.

I'm trying very much to focus on my work and also getting ready for Christmas. It is so tricky because I start out positive and then feel in pain and my anxiety comes flooding back in. I normally absolutely love Christmas but I just haven't got the energy or enthusiasm for it and then I get this overwhelming feeling of worry that I won't be here next Christmas. I'm turning off Christmas songs on the radio because they're so nostalgic and sentimental, which sets me off again.

My question (and also my husband's question) is will the ultrasound put me at ease if nothing is found? I'm not sure if it will and so I know that I have well and truly spiralled. I've done too much reading in PC and finding out that nothing showing blood tests and ultrasounds can be meaningless and that it is a CT scan with the pancreas protocol which is needed.

[Missjensen]

Any updates ?

[greeneyedgirl]

The update was that there was no pancreatic cancer. I had an ultrasound, then met with a consultant who ordered me an MRI with contrast. I sought therapy and thought I was doing better but now I am back almost exactly a year later with brain tumour fears this time.

[Darwin73]

The good news is you ARE here to see this Christmas. Just remember the place you were in this time last year and how your fears were unfounded. You will be in a good place again soon.

[greeneyedgirl]

The good news is you ARE here to see this Christmas. Just remember the place you were in this time last year and how your fears were unfounded. You will be in a good place again soon.

You're so right, thank you. I have been much better this time although I'm still getting some symptoms, it has been really helpful reading back and remembering the horrendous pain I was in that turned out to be caused purely by anxiety.