I know I'm posting again but I'm worried about my eyes

[Chlobo]

It's probably an after effect of Covid Chlobo.

Well done for getting put of the house!

I hope that's all it is, I'm really focusing on my eyes at the moment because my friend is having issues with hers and it's triggered me very badly.
I never really know what's going on anymore, I get so many symptoms all the time, I just can't catch a break

[Fishmanpa]

I just can't catch a break

There's a world full of breaks right in front of you. You only need to take a step forward to realize it

FMP

[Carys]

I get so many symptoms all the time, I just can't catch a break

You .....need to make the break. Yet again, same as I've said before, this is YOU doing this with learnt behaviours and not some mystery serious illness called HA that you can't control.

[BlueIris]

Agreed. There's nothing wrong with you other than health anxiety, it's just something you need to keep on reminding yourself even if it's every other minute.

[Chlobo]

I'm just so worried that I have inflamed optic nerves. It's horrible how someone you know can have a problem and then it sort of leaks into your head. I keep envisioning going to the opticians and they say they are inflamed, queue me having a mental breakdown.
My friend has her MRI tomorrow. If they saw something like a tumour on her scan would they let her leave the hospital without telling her? Or would they want her to wait for a doctor

[Chlobo]

I keep focusing on my vision so much.
It almost seems like colours are more vivid than usual, I can see sort of shadows and blobs on white walls. I'm noticing floaters more.
I just want to be able to go to the eye doctor but the panic is stopping me just in case they find something serious wrong.

[Chlobo]

There's a world full of breaks right in front of you. You only need to take a step forward to realize it

FMP

How did you manage to free yourself from HA? Do you ever feel anxious anymore about potential symptoms? I know you've had cancer diagnosis yourself so I'm wondering how you managed to fight this

[Fishmanpa]

How did you manage to free yourself from HA? Do you ever feel anxious anymore about potential symptoms? I know you've had cancer diagnosis yourself so I'm wondering how you managed to fight this

I never suffered from HA. I found NMP while I was going through cancer treatment and there were HAers constantly bombarding the cancer forum I was on with their worries. I followed a few over here to give them a piece of my mind and ended up staying to try and help. That and the fact my daughter suffers from anxiety and depression, the site had resources that helped me understand her illness and help her.

I did battle some depression after my heart attacks and cancer but my ex suffered from severe depression which manifested itself into hoarding so I recognized the signs and sought help (therapy and meds). In fact, the CBT course here was quite beneficial in helping break some negative thought patterns and I've found many of the techniques useful in everyday life situations and still use them to this day.

I also struggled with what I called 'scanxiety' as I had to have scans every 3 months for the first two years after treatment. Being that I had a 50/50 chance of the cancer returning, you could imagine the stress. For me it manifested as irritability. As before, I recognized it and got some meds. I would start taking them them a couple weeks before the scan and being that it was a non-SSRI, I could stop once I got the all clear. The scans went from every three months to every 6 months after year two and I was declared 'cancer free' after 5 years in the Spring of 2018.

Honestly, rarely do I stress over health issues. After two heart attacks, triple bypass, stents and Stage IVa H&N cancer, if its going to be my time, its going to be my time. I just want it to be quick regardless of how it happens. I'm going to be 63 and I see so many my age and others close to it passing away so you never know when your card will be called. I know my body well enough to know when something is amiss so I call the doctor when needed but otherwise, especially after what I've been through, I deal with the aches and pains that come with enduring what I did and add age to it? Whew! Let's just say ibuprofen in one of my best friends. Add to that 6 prescription meds and a plethora of other supplements and OTC remedies. In the mean time, I'm living, doing things I enjoy (as much as we can in these times), eating right (most of the time) and thankful for every day I wake up and can spend another day with my wife, family and the fur babies.

You asked me directly so I've provided a reply. As others are saying, its up to you. Words on a screen aren't going to help. This has to come from inside of you and the desire to stop living as if you are dying.

The biggest regrets we have in life are not the the things we tried and failed at, they're the things we didn't try due to fear.

Good luck Chlobo....

FMP

[kyllikki]

As others are saying, its up to you. Words on a screen aren't going to help. This has to come from inside of you and the desire to stop living as if you are dying.

FMP,
Say not that words on a screen won't help -- for this was very many words on a screen, eh? Say, rather, that the words on a screen have to spark change, one way or the other -- either in being typed or read!
Otherwise, what are we all doing here, you (chasing us awful annoying HA folk ) ...or anyone else?

Chlobo, I believe in you., even if you don't have many beans to believe in yourself at the moment
BlueIris is right, HA is your real problem -- with the addendum that HA is bad enough to battle
ask at your next therapy appt how they can help you manage the thought/sensation cycle --
for many that's the fist step off the roller coaster of an HA episode

All the best!!

[Chlobo]

I'm so worried about my eyes I've got an appointment at 4 to get them checked, I booked it yesterday but I'm not sure I can actually go due to being scared.
My vision just feels weird, like different lightning looks strange. I've had multiple anxiety attacks this morning already. I'm so scared