Football hooliganism

[Lencoboy]

As an American, I am slightly baffled by football hooliganism, I must admit. We do have sports-event related crowd violence here at times, but it's drowned out by all the other, more regular everyday violence we have.
Therefore, also as an American -- please be incredible thankful your country has sensible weapons and use of force restrictions, for citizens AND police. Ours doesn't and so for many of us everyday activities are anxiety-provoking (rationally or not!) I'm talking things like daily use of public transportation or your vehicle, grocery shopping, concerts, religious services, not to mention schools and government buildings. The sort of things it's hard to avoid.

Whereas I'd move to the UK in a heartbeat as I feel pretty confident I could avoid sports nonsense in any country I lived in!

Nice to know (from an American perspective) that the UK isn't the 'laughing stock of the world', as a lot of our own often gleefully make it out to be, and have been doing particularly for the past 20-odd years now!

[Lencoboy]

I know this won't help, but in my teens I spent some holiday time with a penfriend who lives in Calais. Seen from the outside, the way Brits behaved was abysmal, and I felt embarrassed and intimidated by them. I don't necessarily blame the police in those specific areas for having an attitude.

Surely that was before the 2000s when all the 'Brits behaving badly abroad' stuff that started permeating our conscience largely with the advent of Reality TV, a genre which in itself now seems increasingly tired.

Like it or not (and for better or worse), 'Penfriend' now seems like an alien and outmoded concept with the advent of social media and online forums (including this).

[BlueIris]

It would've been the early 90s; day trips to the hypermarket to stock up on booze and cigarettes were very much the done thing. I went there fairly regularly with my folks.

Honestly, I still write email letters to people, and even if the medium has changed I normally prefer to communicate one on one for anything more than superficial information.

I know I keep saying this, but you really do need to meet and talk to more people, living in such a narrow world can't make you happy.

[Lencoboy]

It would've been the early 90s

Yes, definitely predating the 'moral panics' that have largely been buoyed by the aforementioned 'Reality TV' stuff from the early 2000s onwards.

[Lencoboy]

I know I keep saying this, but you really do need to meet and talk to more people, living in such a narrow world can't make you happy.

I really wish I could, but unfortunately my dad relies quite heavily on me for assistance in managing my mom who has severe dementia, apart from the periods between approximately 10 am and 3 pm on Tuesdays and Thursdays when I attend my day centre.

She does have carers come in on Monday, Wednesday and Friday afternoons while me and my dad do things together such as taking rubbish to the tip, visits to B&Q, etc.

[NoraB]

I really wish I could

If you really want to get out there and meet more people then you have to make it happen.

So, from what I'm seeing, you have Mon, Wed, and Friday afternoons? Is your dad not able to go off and do his own thing for a few hours? Do you think you could tell him that you need some time to do your own thing, for like, sanity purposes?

I sympathise with your parent's issues but you need some time for you, Lenco.

[pulisa]

Would you feel comfortable doing your own thing without your dad, Lenco? Would it be practically possible and would you feel better if you had more independence? You may just be happy to keep things as they are of course?

[NoraB]

You may just be happy to keep things as they are of course?

I was actually thinking this, P..

All my life people have pushed me to be more social but actually I prefer my own company. I do force myself to go out once a week (on my own) because it's necessary but it is getting harder..

I'm glad you made this point. Lenco needs to work out what it is that he wants and if that's to stay as he is, then that's fine..

I used to love going to the DIY shop with my old man!

However, I will add that me forcing myself out the house once a week (on my own) is with the future in mind as family dynamics do change..

[BlueIris]

Nora, this is exactly right. It's way too easy for our worlds to narrow if we're not careful.

Every so often, I make sure to go and see a film on my own or go for a meal somewhere nice. I find it helps me keep track of who I am.

[NoraB]

Nora, this is exactly right. It's way too easy for our worlds to narrow if we're not careful.

Every so often, I make sure to go and see a film on my own or go for a meal somewhere nice. I find it helps me keep track of who I am.

I'm always a few steps away from agoraphobia, Blue. I've had my battles with this beast in the past and I've had to work hard to overcome it. Difference is, I had shit loads of energy then (and I didn't have fibro). Nervous energy and fitness propelled me through my life until I was 40 but things changed drastically and very quickly. It's like I ran on Duracell batteries for decades, then some git swapped them for cheapies that conk out after a few hours.