Hello

About two years a go I had a panic attack on the M1. It came completely out of the blue. I didn’t calm down until I was off if, and then it was instant relief. I tried lots of time afterwards to get back on it, but the panic would set in every single time. It got to a point where even being on a roundabout where one of the exits would make me have a panic attack because I was scared I would accidentally take that turn. As a way of avoidance, I stuck to dual carriageways to get to where I needed to go. While that was fine initially, I then started having panic attacks on dual carriageways, which means I’m now confined to back roads and residential areas. I’m constantly checking routes on how to get somewhere in a way that I will feel comfortable with. I have always been a confident driver, always been a motorway driver. But I have now built this all up in my head and don’t know how to reverse it. A few months ago, I had a driving refresher lesson with an instructor and we did dual carriageways and motorways. Funnily enough, I didn’t panic at all. He said I was a really good driver and he could tell I was a motorway driver. I felt like I had cured it. So later that day, me and my OH decided to do a junction together so I could show him my regained confidence. As soon as we approached the roundabout, bam. I had a panic attack and came back on myself. I don’t know what to do next. I used to love driving. As soon as I get on one of these roads, I completely freeze. It honestly feels like a white knuckle ride and everything in me is screaming. I feel like everything is too bright, too clear. I’m shaking uncontrollably (which makes it quite hard on clutch control). I feel like I’m going to collapse behind the wheel. I’m absolutely terrified. I’ve now left it so long I don’t know what to do. I really don’t have the confidence right now for an exposure method. I know a lot of people say you just have to sit with it and accept it, but it feels so dangerous feeling like that behind the wheel. Please help :(