Is this pregnancy or perimenopause?

[BrokenGirl]

Hi ladies, I'm just looking for a bit of advice on periods, pregnancy and perimenopause


I'm 45 so possibly in or around perimenopause. For the past number of years my periods were always a day or two early, sometimes 3 or even 4. This was normal for me.
Last month it was a day late. I honestly got a bad fright because I was worried I might be pregnant. Was so relieved when it finally came, but a day late was really unusual for me.
Now this month I'm 3 days late and I'm getting a little worried about being pregnant again.
What's really pushed my anxiety sky high is that I was talking to a customer at work last week and she told me that she had been pregnant a few years ago but didn't know it until the baby was born. She said she even had her periods throughout. I had heard of this happening to people before but often wondered how true it was. But talking to this lady really scared me. I'm thinking how is it even possible to have periods every month and still be pregnant?
I don't know if I'm over reacting with this but the one time I thought there might be a slight chance I could be pregnant my period was late.
Is anyone familiar with having periods while being pregnant?

[Catkins]

Are you using contraception? Why don't you do a pregnancy tests?

[BrokenGirl]

Unfortunately I didn't use any contraception, which is why I worried. But I really thought that we had been careful enough.
I'll probably pick up a pregnancy test when I'm out later on but I suppose what I'm really worried about is if it's one of those pregnancies where you still get your periods (which I still don't understand how), will it show up positive on a pregnancy test?

[Carys]

Those pregnancies are rare - and its even more rare for a Cryptic Pregnancy to reach full term without any signs. However, yes, of course it can happen - but I bet you anything it wouldn't happen to you as you are very focused and have heightened emotions to any slight bodily change or twinge. Cryptic pregnancy (from what I've read in the past) does have subtle signs, but people are in denial or ignore those subtle changes and symptoms as they are minimal and 'write them off' as something else.

However, if you are 45 and your period cycle is starting to show signs of being a day or two shorter (and a day or two longer), and you are perimenopausal then there is no way should not be using contraception through the entire month. Ovulation isn't trackable in the same way, it can occur at very different times in the cycle, sometimes not at all in a cycle. I really don't understand why, given that you have a vast array of options nowadays that people who are worried about being pregnant don't use one of them !? We have discussed perimenopause before on NMP, with you, and the cycles shortening by a few days is a classic sign that you are indeed in those early transition years. Often the cycles then start to become longer apart, or even erratic, so there is no way of knowing when and if you are ovulating or how long you have until you are going to enter the proper state of menopause.

I am not familiar with having periods and being pregnant, but there is plenty of information on it online, but lets be honest its the least likely of the scenarios in having a period a few days late. Its far more likely a pregnancy test would show positive when administered at the right time.

[BrokenGirl]

Thanks for your lengthy reply Carys (and thank you too Catkins). While I agree with nearly everything you said, it has heightened my anxiety around it even more. I know I only have myself to blame for not using contraception. I've tried a few of them in the past but I'm extremely sensitive to most medications.

Not knowing when I'm ovulating is a bit scary. But I did think I was just gone past it due to my discharge.

I know you say there is loads of info online about having periods and being pregnant but I don't want to look anything up. I have to be strict about this due to my HA. I wish I could look it up but I learnt the hard way that anything medical or health related is off limits for me.

Can I just ask you Carys, what do you mean by pregnancy test at the right time? Is that any day from the day your period is due?

[Carys]

Can I just ask you Carys, what do you mean by pregnancy test at the right time? Is that any day from the day your period is due?

I am clearly very past the point of knowing about pregnancy tests, the last time I used one was in 1996 LOL Ive just realised that much has changed since then and of course, as is the way, most can be done the day of a missed period (and some even before). After a quick google it says, if you don't know the date your period is due (perimenopause) then 21 days after unprotected sex.

I've tried a few of them in the past but I'm extremely sensitive to most medications.

Maybe, but a condom isn't medication.

Not knowing when I'm ovulating is a bit scary. But I did think I was just gone past it due to my discharge.

Its not a reliable indicator in perimenopause, and I'm pretty sure that for the last couple of years we've talked on your threads about your period changes and symptoms being peri.

[ErinKC]

My cycle was always exactly 24 days my entire life until I hit about 36 and now and then it would go longer sometimes. My doctor said it was normal, so it certainly could be perimenopause. But I agree with others that I'd definitely be using contraceptives. I could never handle birth control so it was condoms for me until I had a hysterectomy last year.

[Carys]

So BrokenGirl, any update on this dilemma - issue ? Just wondering really.

[BrokenGirl]

Sorry I didn't reply sooner Carys, life has been a bit hectic the last few weeks. I went to the doctor and she did a blood pregnancy test. Thankfully it was negative. She said those types of pregnancies can happen but they are extremely rare. Usually the woman would have had a very irregular cycle anyway, so going months without a period would be nothing new. And if they did bleed it would usually be more like spotting rather than a heavy period.

I asked her about perimenopause and she thinks that I'm not in it yet. We had a good chat about it but she said she didn't see any point in doing hormonal blood tests now. Obviously if things get more irregular and I start having other symptoms to go back to her. But she said for now it looks as if everything is ok.

So I'll just wait and see how things go. But thank you Carys for all your advice. I really do appreciate it x