Fed up with panic

[Cconnie]

I have a few worries at the minute mainly around my other half going on holiday abroad soon, I feel like I cannot go due to anxiety/panic. I see friends and family able to go places and enjoy themselves while I stay back and overthink everything. I'm scared I'm going to have a huge panic attack and want them to come home but as they're in a different country they just cannot.
My panic/anxiety has been going on a number of years and I have missed a number of events, I have tried a few different things but I don't know if me avoiding things just makes it worse.
Think I just want to talk to others who understand what it is like, I want to do more. Feel like I thought I'd do more this year but keep getting ill then because I don't feel great I'm not pushing myself to do anything. Don't want to keep being like this.

[NoraB]

I have tried a few different things but I don't know if me avoiding things just makes it worse.

Aside avoidance (which doesn't help with anxiety), what things have you tried?

[Carnation]

The experts say its not good to avoid. However, it's also not a good idea to push yourself too hard. It's all about balance and gradually building up to doing stuff. Have you been going places pre this holiday arising?
And in many people's experiences it's the pre-anxiety to an event which is the worst.
Also meditation can work wonders. Especially if you imagine doing the trip visualising a smooth and happy time. Things like packing can be unnerving, so maybe pack last minute but have a list so you don't forget anything.
Most importantly remember anxiety can not kill you, it's there to protect you!

[NoraB]

Most importantly remember anxiety can not kill you, it's there to protect you!

Absolutely!! (It just feels really crap).

[Cconnie]

what things have you tried?

I've tried CBT, dropping safety behaviours, meditation, hypnotherapy, I do yoga, tried medication but its not my favourite, I have tried doing more things and saying yes to more things too.

have you been going places pre this holiday arising?

I've been going more places that I have the past few years, it just seems to be that when I get to the new place or on the way I have a panic attack but instead of leaving I'm staying until calm.

Most importantly remember anxiety can not kill you, it's there to protect you!

It just feels rubbish at the time.

I think I'm also just worrying as had a bad anxious period last year where I couldn't leave the house and felt so on edge everyday, even went to the hospital as I felt so crap. So I'm already doing a lot more than what I was doing, maybe just not pushing myself as much but within a still manageable amount. My other half thinks this holiday will help me or that it is a chance to show that I can do this but I think its too much considering I still struggle to go more that 30 minutes away from where I live.

[NoraB]

I've tried CBT, dropping safety behaviours, meditation, hypnotherapy, I do yoga, tried medication but its not my favourite, I have tried doing more things and saying yes to more things too.

Good work!

I've been going more places that I have the past few years, it just seems to be that when I get to the new place or on the way I have a panic attack but instead of leaving I'm staying until calm.

That's really good. This is also what happens to me in new places. Historically, I would go into a full-scale panic and cut short the holiday, but I realised that was only adding to the problem. Now, I expect the panic attacks, and I deal with them as I would at home. My brain just needs to know that there's no danger, and it does settle down..