Hi, All

I'm new to this site and would like opinions as to what I'm suffering from, if anything.

First I'll tell you a bit about my life:

I was very fit up until my early 20's then I went into self destruct mode for 10 years: drugs, booze, smoking all the nice but wrong foods. I'd played rugby for years but got injured bad and had to stop playing for good. Anyway I eventually ended up having the last rites due to a drugs overdose. Somehow and for some reason I survied my little trip and decided enough was enough and things would have to change.

After I'd been out of hospital for a few weeks I started doing some exercise again but my body was a wreck due to all the abbuse it had been through. I gave up the drugs, drinking, and smoking and slowly built my fitness back up over the months and years and then in 2003 did the London Marathon in just under 3 hours. I now run every day or do some form of exercise and my doctor tells me I have a cardio vascular system of a 20yr old. I have a fantastic partner and a job that I love so much I'd do it for free. Life it seems is perfect; well it would be without my problems!

I can feel great one minute then the next for no reason feel like everything is going to turn to shit or that I'm or the people I love are going to die. Every little ache and pain has me thinking I've got some terminal disease or that a stroke/brain hemorage is on the way. I have chest pains and funny sensations down my arms. I don't go to the doctor any more if I can help it because I feel like a idiot when he tells me there's nothing wrong. I get sickly weird feelings in my head that are hard to describe which come and go as they please and a panic sometimes that feels a bit like the sudden shock you get when a plane hits turbualnce. Other times I have a dread which comes over me which I can only describe like the feeling I had as a young child when I realised that when you die thats it your dead! Sound a right cheerful so an so but thats the only way I can describe my feelings, Sorry!

Myself I think it's some kind of mental problem or the effects of all the class A drugs coming back to haunt me. The other thing that might not help is my lack of faith, although I was christened a catholic, I'm a non believer in the Almighty. I've tried my hardest to believe but to no avail.

Anyone care to make a diagnosis, or do I need to go and have a chat to a Headshrinker

Cas