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Thread: I Don't Know What to do.

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Dec 2012
    Posts
    57

    I Don't Know What to do.

    Hello,
    I am nearly 60 and agoraphobic.
    I haven't left my house, except to put the bins out, in nearly 4 years. My son has recently moved quite away from me, and I really want to visit him, plus, as I'm getting older, I want to move house to be closer to where he lives (he is all the family I have). The problem is I really don't know how I'm going to do it. The whole thing makes me feel sick when I think about it.
    I have been mildly agoraphobic for quite a few years, and have always pushed myself to go out to do shopping etc, but I have got worse since my son first moved out in early 2020. I have learnt that pushing myself does not work, it used to take me all day to pluck up the courage to go to my local shop.
    I really want to visit my son, but I am so scared. Is there anything I can do to help myself with this, or would you not advise me not to go?

    Thank you for reading.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Nov 2018
    Posts
    7,787

    Re: I Don't Know What to do.

    Not sure what to tell you, there are a fair few agoraphobic people on here but I'm not one of them.

    I just want you to know that I've read this, I empathise and I hope you can find a solution.
    __________________
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    Sometimes, it's better to light a flamethrower than curse the darkness. - Terry Pratchett

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Nov 2011
    Posts
    283

    Re: I Don't Know What to do.

    I’m so sorry for how you are suffering I went through a short spell of agoraphobia many years ago and I believe it was medication that helped get me back on an even keel are you on any medication or have any access to mental health services xx

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Dec 2012
    Posts
    57

    Re: I Don't Know What to do.

    Thank you for reading and replying.

    I will do some reading and maybe I'll find something.

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Dec 2012
    Posts
    57

    Re: I Don't Know What to do.

    I'm making it worse for myself because I can't stop thinking about it.

    Currently, I'm taking Pregabalin and have been for several years but suspect I need a higher dose, and/or different medication, it is nearly impossible to get a GP appointment at the moment, it feels like a lottery and I've not been lucky yet!
    I have just finished counselling but I'm seriously considering starting some more.

    Thank you for reading and replying.

  6. #6
    Join Date
    May 2021
    Posts
    2,748

    Re: I Don't Know What to do.

    I've had problems in the past with agoraphobia, but fortunately only had very short periods where I couldn't go out. I guess it was more a manifestation of how I was feeling maybe. Medication, counselling and CBT helped me. Ultimately it was about taking small steps, going out in the car (the being able to get home quick), walking to the corner of the street etc and building my confidence slowly. Learning techniques to cope with the panic attacks really helped.

    Is there an email option at your GP's? We have an e-consult thing at ours.

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Nov 2011
    Posts
    283

    Re: I Don't Know What to do.

    You’re not making it worse on purpose you can’t stop the thoughts coming it’s trying to let them come and let them go but this is easier said that done I know! Try an econsult and tell them you need some help and support also our surgery has a cpn attached who rang me when I told them how bad I was feeling xx

  8. #8

    Re: I Don't Know What to do.

    hi ive had agoraphobia or 30 years if u would like a chat sometime

  9. #9

    Re: I Don't Know What to do.

    nobody ever wants to chat, or go in chat room

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Dec 2012
    Posts
    57

    Re: I Don't Know What to do.

    Hello and thank you for replying.

    I suspected something was wrong a long time ago, years in fact because thinking back to childhood and being a young adult, I never liked going out on my own but pushed myself because my dad told me to, but it never did help.

    There used to be an e-consult, and you could make appointments for your GP online, but since COVID and lockdown you can't do that, now you have to phone or go to the surgery at 8 am, and if you're lucky you get an appointment, but I've not been lucky yet. I've not had a GP appointment since September 2020 and that was over the phone.

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