High BP - some words of wisdom if you have any

[JooBug]

Hi. Long time lurker, first time poster and would love some words of wisdom/comfort from people who understand.

My BP has been bit high for a time read at Drs surgery. I had issues reading at home as I am large (though on a weight loss journey) and carry weight on limbs so getting right cuff to fit was difficult. Tho am down to a UK size 20/22 I am still an outlier in the arm department.

I am on a health kick and got BP read at Drs. Was high at first (didn't tell me the numbers but I think flippin high) but came down during the appointment to 160/100 high but not alarming ans told to monitor at home for a week.

That gets me into difficult territory because a)the arm thing and b) its practically a phobia and in my case worse at home I would say as I feel at sea with it and no idea what to so if its high.

Still I tried and got some scary numbers. Rang Dr who said prob poorly fitting cuff lets do 24hr ambulatory. Tried but cuff too tight. In end after a stressful say of it being sent around pharmacies because noone understood the problem re arm size they fitted me in at the surgery and did an old fashioned manual reading and it was 220/100 straight on a pill that night.

It's been a week and I now have to start monitoring to see how the pill is working and as anxious peeson all the what ifs are there. I decided to go to the surgery this evening for the first reading rather than getting in a tizz at home ans going to take my monitor in as I worry about fit and placement etc. Even then am scared about having to monitor after that appt and scared it will still be high in first place.

I wish I could just drift thru but its not my nature and recently atress had made me resilience less. Guess would just like some encouraging or good news stories. It's been a hard week as anxious avoidant me has felt every bodily sensation and been afraid to do much.

[BlueIris]

Hi!

I'm very much where you are now - we're the same size and very anxious. I'm sort of in awe of you for even getting to a doctor, to be honest.

I think what you need to focus on is the "high but not alarming" reading. Chances are your BP is much lower when you're not in a state of stress. I had mine read yesterday - don't know the numbers because it's one fewer thing to stress about - and I was told it was elevated, but expectedly so given that I was there because of anxiety issues.

I would bet cold hard cash that you're in the same position.

[JooBug]

Thanks so much for your kind and quick reply BlueIris.

Yes rational me says those really high spikes are under stress and that I have high BP that needs treatment that means when it goes up it really goes up but I don't need to walk around like I might collapse at any time. Just need to treat it. But unrational anxious me....you know the drill, I am sure.

Then I have this slight feeling I am taking up the nurse's prexious time by not just getting on and reading it but the sight of a BP monitor freaks me out. I hope a baseline from there today that might reassure me the meds are working might help over next few days. Basically am not mad keen on medical testing being my responsibility or in my home. I prefer it to be more compartmentalised. I think my anxiety about it might be worse than my white coat hypertension!

I've really wanted to attack my health anxiety head on. My nature is avoidance so it's work to do it but the avoidance was work too and the older you get the less effective it is which is what I could tell me younger self! Doubt she would listen. I was also lucky not to be too ill when yoing so I just don't have the practice with all this of that makes sense.

[BlueIris]

I honestly think we may be the same person, except that I have to be having an actual breakdown before I get tested at all.

I hope you don't mind me saying this, but I think that as bigger people we get conditioned to believe that fat always= worst case scenario. Sometimes, though, things aren't really that big a deal.

Totally agree with you on the problems of avoidance as somebody getting older. I'm 47 now, and very aware that I need to start my health journey sooner rather than later. Last August, I made it to the optician for the first time in 27 years, and I had bad eyesight to begin with.

Sending positive vibes and tons of online support.

[JooBug]

I am a bit older than you, so we are not quite twins! 😂

Well done on the eye test too. I had mine recently and it took about 20mins for them to get 3 puffs if air into my eye!

Xx