Is this a form of social anxiety

[Lilith1980]

Hi all,

I dont know why I've never asked this question before - I have asked it in my own mind but never of anyone else, maybe I already know the answer, but I'd appreciate any feedback


Regarding my job, when I am given something to do - its never anything complicated - I tend to put off doing it until the deadline is near. I always get things done and have never got in trouble for it. But the more I put it off, the more worried I get, so why dont I just do it instead of avoiding it? A lot of my tasks are really boring and not challenging at all, so maybe I just cant face doing them?

Also, if anything requires me to go and actually see someone in the office, or walking to the photocopier (both of which mean I have to walk past people) or even phoning people, I especially put these tasks off. I dread having to walk round the office (which is really big) to see people. Once I am there, talking to who I am meant to see, I am ok. But the process of walking through the office and back fills me with dread as I imagine that people are staring at me and all I want to do is get back to my desk. A lot of time I find myself holding my breath, just to get me through walking around the office. This sounds sad but I have to walk past people to get to the ladies' toilets and I have deliberately put off going to the toilet because I dont want to walk past people

A lot of the time, if I have to find something out from someone, it could be done alot quicker and easier by me phoning them. But I email them instead because I dread speaking to people on the phone in the fear that they will be annoyed at me for ringing. Or they will be "off" with me over the phone. When I do phone people they are perfectly fine and helpful, so I dont know why I dont learn from this. I am trying to phone people more but the walking around the office is still a problem.

Is this a social phobia? I have suffered with this for a number of years.

Thanks guys xxxxx

[russell]

i used to be the same when i worked in a large office i found it so intimidating, i suppose because i lacked in confidence and hated walking past people and yes i used to hold my breath i still do when i have to do something i don't like.

for the last 20 years i've worked in a small invironment and overcome my fear of the phone (used to hate having to talk on the phone - i think because i was scared of embarassing my self if i didn't know how to deal with problem) the only way i could cope with this was to really learn my job so i became confident in what i was doing . i think that it probably is a social phobia as i still hate being in large groups and could never work in a large place it would fill me with dread.

is a change of job an option for you?

kind regards

[Lilith1980]

Thanks for your reply Russell. Well I am mostly confident in my job as its so mundane and I never get given anything challenging to do!

I used to work in the charity sector so would like to do that again. I have been looking for jobs but nothing has jumped out at me yet. I guess I just have to keep looking

[Bill]

It sounds to me what I would call "boredom stress".

Our minds are So active they need constant stimuli. When we're doing a boring job, our mind will focus on "ourselves" and we become self conscious due to our insecurity.

If you were doing a really engrossing interesting job, I don't think you'd feel so aware of our own insecurities because your mind would have too much else to think about.

For instance, I Hate jobs like hoovering or mowing the lawn etc because to me they're So boring. My mind will wander and I have to keep it trained on what I'm doing but I have no need when my mind is totally occupied.

[slavetoanxiety]

Hi
I have the same problem. I was ok dealing with my immediete team but if I had to go to another office i would do everything to avoid it. I would even send the office junior to do things for me that I should be doing myself. As you say once you have done it you wonder what you were worrying about.
Sadly it has cost me a number of good jobs over the years not through bad work but I just could not keep up with the stress of talking and dealing with people I did not know very well. Even now I have to ask my seven year old son to do daft things for me in public, yet on other occasions I am as bold as they come. I can only suggest that when you do speak to the people that you are dealing with try to extend the conversations and in time you will get to know them better and you will feel more comfortable in their presence.

regards

Slave