Re: Scared in a group
Hi Phoebe, You are definately not alone in this, i would say the majority of anxious people do not like to be in group situations, and i know in my case it comes from having heightened senses. When i am in a group and lots of people are chatting and it is noisey, i find it really distracting and start to worry that i am going to miss what someone is saying and that they will think i am rude for not answering so i tend not to talk to anyone. I am also terrified of saying something stupid and everyone hearing. I was also treated at school exactly the way you were, and i would definately class it as bullying, i was never hit, but verbal bullying is not taking so seriously so the teachers couldn't understand why it bothered me so much. But it does eat away at your confidence and self esteem and i still feel today that people are only nice to me to my face but they don't really like me. It is a hard one to get over if you are not naturally confident, and my husband always tells me "i couldn't care less if people like me or not it says more about them than it does you" I have tried to teach my daughters to be nice to everyone, and am always encouraging them to befriend the new or not so popular kids as i think how you are treated at school has a big impact on how you are treated in later life. I know i just need to get a thicker skin. Also i avoid talking to people on the phone and don't answer it in the day unless it is a pre- arranged call, i don't know what it is i just get really nervous and can't get my words out and feel trapped as i can't just end the conversation without seeming rude, sounds stupid as most people who do phone are strangers that i am never likely to meet anyway !! Good luck with the socializing.
Jacq x
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