Had to succumb to meds again

[Yvonne]

Spent the last 7 weeks with no medication after many years. The duloxetine which I had been on for a year had done practically zilch for my panics - should have come off it sooner really.

Made a decision to go meds free because no med had really had a therapeutic effect over the last three years post Seroxat. "No" meds seemed the only way to go and I did very well tho I say it myself lol.

I took on a very positive attitude and tried every coping strategy known to "anxious" man and wasn't doing badly at all.

I have a lot of stress around at the moment with another house move (3rd in three years) - don't ask.

Had a bad week last week and was so so edgy and just flying off the handle for no good reason, getting frustrated with everything and generally feeling pretty bad. On Saturday I was feeling really rough and was having little weepy episodes on and off throughout the day.

That really scared me and I just thought I was going to get much worse and what with all this stuff I have to do ........... arghhh - that's how I felt.

I phoned the psychiatrist to get some more reassurance about the new medication (Moclobemide) - and he sold it to me. Please god let it have the long awaited therapeutic effect.


Now as unbelievable as it seems I have felt so much less edgy today - I think its do with med but who knows.

Didn't get much sleep last night but seeing as insomnia is one of the side effects of this med I do expect that for the next couple of weeks. I aint complaining as long as it works.

Love to all

[Jimbo]

Glad you managed to speak to the psychiatrist about it. They at least know best of anyone.

Don't feel so bad about being on the meds, if it helps and isn't causing you too many side effects then why not. At least you've had a period of being without them so you will know if they are working.

Hope you manage some sleep soon.

Jim

[chalky]

Hi Yvonne,

Your posts always impress me because it is crystal clear how hard you are fighting for your health.
I agree with Jimbo-Meds is not failure but an aid to recovery.
I,for one, am very proud of you.
Keep posting.
Keep sharing.

Best wishes,
Chalky

[Yvonne]

Ahhh, Thanks both of you - made me feel not so much of a failure.

I will defo keep posting - how could I stop with nice people like you two around.

Take care xxxxx
Love to all

[CarmR]

Hi Yvonne,

I have read many of your posts following your struggle with meds, and how you have coped,etc.
I would just like to say that i admire you, you are an inspiration, and you have strength and i do hope that the Moclobemide does in some way help you.

I dont post that much, i should do tho...i sometimes find that what i have to say isn't important enough, but thats probably just the Anxiety & Dep in me, silly really, but really just wanted to wish you the best.

I will look forward to hearing how you are getting on Yvonne.

Good luck and hugs to you

Carmelx

[Pink Panic]

Hi Yvonne,

I said my thoughts to you on email but just wanted to say on here too that i really hope the meds work for you.

Thinking of you.

xxxxxxx

[sagey]

Hi Yvvonne, like others said, don't feel defeatist at trying meds again while things are difficult for you. I'm still not on anything but that is partly due to the agoraphobia and not being able to get in the docs. However, I've been really depressed for several weeks and think I might benefit from some anti-d's, wondering that if perhaps my mood was lifted I could be more optomistic about dealing with the anxiety. I hope things get better for you very soon and the meds do their job. Sagey.

[lorac]

Yvonne, I agree with Chalky, you are positive and seem to be doing so well with your battle. Don't be dissapointed coz you are back on meds if they work then stick with them while you need them.

I notice you are from Colchester which is only down the road from me, perhaps one day we shall meet.

Carol
xx

xxx

[Yvonne]

Oh what a lovely load of posts - I'm gonnna cry ........ Thank you so much

Carmel, you must never think that what you have to say is not important. Of course it is incredibly important - whatever it is that makes you feel bad is important to YOU and if it makes you feel bad it's more than important.

You shouldn't worry about how your postings come across - you just speak from the heart and I am sure people will be only too pleased to support you and try to help. I never ever worry about how my posts come across - sometimes don't even check for typos - I just write exactly what I'm thinking and I don't care how I come across.

Anyway Carmel you've got me all worried about you now - please do let us all know how you are feeling. You mentioned the anx and depression - please say what's bothering you. Otherwise, pm someone on the site - someone whose posts you like reading - or someone you feel may be similar to y ou. I do it, I don't worry at all. PM me if you want - I could talk the hind leg off a donkey lol.

Pink : thanks darlingxxxxxx

Sagey; Is there no one who could go to the doctors' with you. I know how you feel because I hate to sit in that bloomin waiting room - it can be so awful. If you can't get anyone to go with you - could you not have a telephone consultation with the doctor - loads of them do it now.

I did feel a bit defeatist about going back on meds but just knew that the panics were getting worse and it was this feeling of out of control stress. As I said, I have lots to do at the moment (and it is expected of me to do these things!!!) - so I have to be somewhere near okay to carry on.

As I said we have another house move which is the third in three years - all to our benefit and it's great for me for reasons which I will not go into now. However, the stress of bloomin solicitors and estate agents - well no wonder I am mega stressed.

Sagey, when I came off the Duloxetine 8 weeks ago I had completely decided that meds weren't going to do anything for my anxiety. As you know I have tried a few with no luck. However, when I began to get some scary levels of the anxiety last week I just felt that I could not stand it any longer. I just thought that maybe just maybe this new med may help.

The thing is that anxiety and depression can make you so feel so ill in so many ways that if there is a medication that could work then surely we must try to find that med.

Please try to speak to the doctor don't keep suffering.

As to me, the med seems to be helping the anxiety already. I know people will scream that the med isn't even in my system yet but I know myself.

The symptoms have been less severe - racing heart not so powerful - any churns in the tummy - very mild. Also for some reason stopped getting so many negative thoughts about the whole thing.

So... I have feeling better than I was and was looking forward to even more good stuff.

....... However, had a little bit of a setback this morning - can't go into it - nothing to get alarmed about ... but, let's say it was something that was rather challenging to me. I was doing brill, all confident and smiley and relaxed. Then, someone said something and it must have started off a trail of thoughts about myself and bang got really panicky.

It's so stupid cos for over 2 h ours I had felt very very good then what I have done is actually dwelt on something rather trivial and I have made my anxiety "come alive" this afternoon with worrying about it.

Aint gonna worry no more.... because this medication is the one - I know cos me shrink said so lol. xxxxxx

Love to allx

I must have felt good last couple of days because instead of taking my Reid Wilson book to bed I took my new Russel Brand Booky Wook!

[joannap]

hi yvonne

i have read a lot of your posts before and think you cope brilliantly. it is amazing but i started to feel a bit better from day 1 when on meds but now i think that this is because i knew i was starting to take something that may help me. it was a very gradual improvement and although my anxiety hasn;t gone it is much more manageable but i do wonder if it is a placebo effect - the mind gets enough rest by knowing we are on a new med and sort of allows us just enough space to start improving naturally. not saying this is what is happening in your case at all but improvement does happen so slow on meds that sometimes i wonder if it isn;t us doing all the work! even my gp has said that!

hope you go from strength to strength. x