Well, I guess it depends on your situation in life and whether you're a cynic or enjoy an excuse to show how much you love someone.
Whatever your view, there is a valuable lesson to learn that anxiety and fear can cause.
I know a man who was born afraid of being left on his own. So much so that he'd cry in his pram and as a toddler follow his mother wherever she went desperate to held to be shown some love but the mother wouldn't smother him because she was afraid of "mothering" him too much.
However, as the years went by he was suddenly hit by the loss of a school friend. Then his brothers and sister all left home to pastures new with their partners leaving him feeling abandoned and unloved.
He could never find a girlfriend because he was too shy and too quiet. He was afraid of girls because he got so anxious talking to them and yet every night he dreamt of just holding a girls hand, only to wake to a cruel lonely reality.
Even at work he was still too shy and couldn't attract the opposite sex until one day a young woman turned up who needed help. He couldn't say "no", he so much wanted to be loved and was afraid if he let her go he'd never meet another so a few months later they were married.
However, she was too ill to show warmth or affection so still he felt alone. As the years went by her illness and stresses at work mounted until he could see no way out other than to ease the pain of living by self harming and taking overdoses. If he lost his life, what would it matter he thought. He was trapped by fear anyway with no means of escape because he feels a soft and weak man who just couldn't face life alone or hurting others.
Later after years of marriage he lost his closest friend, his father, which amplified the hurt and pain he'd felt for so many years of feeling so alone but now he looks to his mother who needs his support so the habits of the past can no longer be considered, although he wouldn't want to go back to them anyway.
He copes with all his anxieties, his OCD and phobias...bar one, which he feels he can never overcome so he resigns himself to the life he has trapped himself in and instead offers what he can to help others but he knows he only has himself to blame. Instead he reminds himself of the things he's grateful to have and that he no longer suffers as he used to or like others.
So before you celebrate Valentines day or commit to someone you love, be Absolutely Sure it's for Love and that You will be loved, and not out of fear of never finding love and living all your life alone. Don't make the same mistakes as him because fear makes your decisions or you too could trap yourselves for a lifetime.
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loopy~leisa
