sudden death

[Panic1971]

I havent posted on here for a while now - not that I have been feeling any better because I havent - but have been checking in every day or so.

The main problem I have at the minute is the fear of sudden death or dying.

It is just completely taking over my thoughts, and I am having difficulty controlling my anxiety.

Every symptom I get or have I think 'death' or I have some life threatening illness which will result in death. I just dont know what to do anymore.

My body is aching from all the 24/7 tension that I have, and I find it difficult to relax.

I am now worrying about the stress I am putting my body under by all the tension and anxiety that I carry. They say stress is the silent killer.

There have been loads of stories recently about people suddenly dying (all different ages too). There was a 5 year old on the news recently who died in the school playground at playtime and my mum was telling me today of a friend of a relative that died of a heart attack aged only 25.

Any advice or tips on how to overcome this???

[seeker]

Try not to think about it! Honestly, I sometimes worry about this, too, but the chances are absolutely miniscule. It may seem harsh, but sometimes when I hear about things like that, I think 'They were the statistic, not me'. Usually there is a genetic element to these sorts of deaths - the 'sudden death' syndrome is (I belive) caused by a faulty heart muscle, and often families will say lots of relatives died at an early age.

I also think 'If I did keel over and die, would I rather have spent my last day worriyng about it or doing something fun?', so I try and do something fun and/or useful each day.

[seeker]

Also, I know what you mean about the stress and worry, but I have also read some statistics that say stress and worry can be good for you - your body copes to adapt with all sorts of things. If it is really taking over your thoughts, you need to see the doc pronto, as it can be a symptom of depression - certainly when I had this really badly, I was suffering clinical depression and it got better with time and anti depressants.

[bottleblond]

Hi Ann

It's very hard for someone who sufferes from Health Anxiety not to take these stories to heart and worry about them. But you have to think logicaly here hun, the chances are probably zero of this ever happening to you.

I'm 36 now and over the past 20 years or more, my mind has told me i have had.....

lung cancer
a brain tumour
a collapst lung
an ulcer
throat cancer
mouth cancer
tongue cancer
organ failure
blah blah blah blah....i have never had any of there to date and all that time worrying about it was just a pure waste!

try to put it to the back of your mind and bring on the positive thinking!!


take care

Love Lisa
xxxx

[Liverbird67]

Hiya
That is exactly the same thing I worry about, honestly its no fun at all, I think that this is a symptom of depression, I would go to see the Dr, sometimes anti-depressants help, I was like you approx 6 weeks ago, absolutely awful these thoughts filled my every waking moment, in bed, in bath, cooking the meals, scared to go out, I started taking an anti-depressant, first week hell things got worse, but my sleep was beginning to improve, five weeks on, I can go around the shops, go into the city and things are looking up, hopefully will be able to return to work in the next couple of weeks, don't give up hope, I know it is scary but try not to dwell on things, I know that this is easier said than done, but your mind gets stuck like a record and the same thoughts whirl around your head its called ruminating,l honestly try to distract yourself, try and read (not them womens mags were people die and get sick!) try and watch something on the telly even if its crap, sometimes this is better if not too serious, ask GP for a blood test in case you are run down, (lots of things would show up on this) take vitamins please believe me it will pass eventually.

Never give up hope

Take care of yourself
Love
Liverbird
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

[AtmoLav]

This might be taken the wrong way so sorry in advance if it offends. I've been here many, many times. When I was young, I used to worry that there would be a fire over night and I'd die. I've always been like that. Death here there and everywhere. And a constant fear.

But do you know what?

IF i died tomorrow, I wouldn't even know about it. I'd be gone. It might hurt for a bit, but it'd be over. And the other things I sometimes worry about - how others would cope - well, they wouldn't be my problem any more. Because I wouldn't know. I no longer fear death because when that happens it's over. I don't want to die, heck - survival is programmed into every cell in my body. But if I died suddenly, it'd be sudden and it wouldn't be my fault and it wouldn't be my problem any more.

You see, what I'm scared of is a slow, progressive disease that ultimately ends in death. That I wouldn't be able to deal with.

I think worrying about death ultimately stems from worrying about other people and the effect you have on them. How my fiancee would cope if I died has crossed my mind on several occassions, but that's not something I can control.

Instead, I'm finally starting to accept that my life is primarily about me. I've had enough of this anxiety, it all stems from worrying about how others feel in my case, it all stems from trying to make other people happy. Well, no more. If it happens, it happens right?

Don't know if this helps....sorry if it didn't (

[Franz]

My body is aching from all the 24/7 tension that I have, and I find it difficult to relax.

I am now worrying about the stress I am putting my body under by all the tension and anxiety that I carry. They say stress is the silent killer.

There have been loads of stories recently about people suddenly dying (all different ages too). There was a 5 year old on the news recently who died in the school playground at playtime and my mum was telling me today of a friend of a relative that died of a heart attack aged only 25.

Any advice or tips on how to overcome this???

Ann,

Firstly, these stories you hear are very rare cases - in most cases of people dying so young like this, there are basic genetic problems that lead to it. The chances of it happening to you are almost certainly miniscule.

Secondly, the funny thing with being convinced you're going to die is that you FEEL it so strongly, almost like an intuition. I've had this experience myself. I had a nervous breakdown last November and caught the train up to my parents'. It was a very difficult journey and throughout it I had this utter conviction that I was going to their house to die. It really was a "gut feeling", or so I thought.

Thirdly, as for the stress you're putting your body under by worrying: well your body can handle a LOT of stress before it packs up! Of course chronic stress can lead to health problems, and sometimes I find it helps just to accept the stress - take the attitude, "I'm stuck with this stress, it won't be doing me much good, but all I can do is keep plugging away at improving things." I get by by taking each week at a time, and not projecting my fear too far into the future if I can help it. I've got enough to deal with in the present!

Best wishes,

Francis

[lesleya]

Hi Hun

I know exactly what you mean and what it feels like to worry like that. Ive worried and had panic/anxiety since i was 16. I had 15 years of doing what your doing, and you know what.....what a total waste of time it was too.
I cant ever get those years back now, wish i could, but they are gone never to return, and i cant tell you how much i regret loosing all those years through worrying im going to drop dead suddenly, or develop a wasting painfull illness, or loose my marbles, and how will my son or my husband ever cope without me or my grandchildren will never know me, will they just forget about me, will hubby re-marry etc etc etc the list is endless.
But, i got to a point where i thought either i carry on living from day to day in constant fear, or, i start to live. Thank goodness I chose the latter, because i had a young son, I was a single parent, and he didnt deserve a mum like me that couldnt take him out or do the things that 'normal' mums and sons do, so i had to change the way i thought.
I am not meaning to sound hard or unsympathetic, because i really do sympathise, but i just really hate to see somone so young with everything to look forward too wasting years worrying over the inevitable. If we die..we die and we cant do a blessed thing to stop it...so why worry about 'if' and 'when' it will happen. Id rather die today and know ive at least enjoyed my last years or days. We only get one go around the merry-go-round so get out there and enjoy it.
Im still here 34 years on??? and hopefully will be in another 34.

[Lissy43]

It really is not something you should worry about, its not worth it. Any one of us could fall down the stairs, get run over by a bus etc.... tomorrow morning but we don't go to bed at night worrying about it.

It is VERY rare, if its going to happen it will but honestly the chances are it won't so don't panic.

I worry about my health if I feel ill, I assume the worst but I would not panic over sudden death or anything but yes when you hear stories it does make you worry more than usual but say to yourself its rare and live your life. You only get one shot at life so its not worth worrying about dying all of the time like you are doing but I have been where you are and its not nice at all.

Pm me if you need support.

[nomorepanic]

What will be will be

We cannot change destiny!

We can look after ourselves and do out best but if we drop dead then we have no control over it so no point wasting time worrying about it to be honest.

We won't even know about it!

Life is for living not for waiting to die!