single parents

[bluesparkle]

hi
i just wondered if there were any more single parents on here...
not that it makes the problems any more difficult or easier to live with..
i would jusat like to e.mail some people in the same position as myself...
rach

[nomorepanic]

Rach

Sal is on her own with her daughter so I am sure she will post.

Nicola

[tessa]

hI
I am a single mom of a 3 year old girl.. The dad is not involved at all. I find raising a child alone is reallY tough. Especially when mommie is having an attack and she doesn't seem to understand why I am so irritable and moody. [}]


Do you ever feel like this?

tessa

[bluesparkle]

yes i do know how you feel... i have 4 children aged 19, 17, 15 and 10...(eldest at uni) i have brought them up on my own for 7 yrs now....
but yes when i am feeling irritable and moody and anxious it is really hard ...and when i do shout at them i feel really guilty... also im sure they pick up on my ocd too especially the youngest... she tries so hard to help
i also find when there is a problem at school etc its very hard to deal with on top of everything else...
when i cant cope i go and make a cuppa and sit in the garden!!! then come back and try again...
although i know this sounds a bit gloomy i look at them when they have achieved something and feel really proud of them cos they have had to put up with a lot so i must have got something right...
rach

[sal]

Hi Rach

Totally know what you are going through, although i only have one daughter who is 10 in May, but i do struggle. I have been on my own with her for over 8 years and at times it has driven me to despair and i look back now and wonder when i was really ill how i coped.

It can be a lonely life i know that and you can miss adult company or even just conversation. Feel free to email me whenever you want or pm me and we could swap numbers.

Until then you take care.

Love Sal xx


Dont mess up the best things in your life, just because at present you are unsure who you are.

[tessa]

hi rach its me again, I just need to vent a little. First off, I have a wonderful boyfriend. He works offshore and when he is out I keep his children for him so this means not only do I have my 3 year old but alsoI have His 2 boys. The ages are 9, 6, and then my daughter whom is 3. The oldest boy hank I taught last year in second grade and am now dating his dad. he has been having a hard time with it. His mom is bipolar who has a drug problem and I think he kind of resents the fact that i do things for him that his mom should be doing. Like birthdays, baseball, Christmas, Easter, etc.
Anyway, I am off for spring break and his two boys went off with some neighbors of ours to go to the beach. I left my boyfriends this morning , to go home and get my daughters and my bathing suits. so Hallee my daughter stayed back with him and when I got back , they had gone to get gas for his boat that he got last weekend. We were going out on it today. To make along story short. When I got back to his house his nerves were completely frazzled, because my daughter had been whining and throwing fit. I mean when she gets something on her mind that she wants to do, it's balls against the wall and she just will not relent. So my boyfriend or I guess what ya'll call your Mate, is completely frustrated when I get back to his house, he is fussing and being loud, Not violent, just irritable. I walk up stairs and BOOOOOOOOM!!!PANIC ATTACK. I dont know if you have this but I just began sweating profusly, Diarreah, you know the usual crapt. Then I got that derealization feeling. I walked downstairs to get my purse because I knew this was a time for a XanAx I save those for only when I am desperate too. I asked my mate if he could give me a few minutes and he said are you ok and I said I just need a few. He was like are having a panic and I said yes. He responded with I guess I should not have been so loud because I was irritated with your daughter. "I'm sorry" he said. It just made me feel so good to hear it. He walked upstairs after a few and started laughing when he saw me because I had to strip all my clothes off because I felt as though I was suffocating. I replied with Honey it was just something I had to do. And you know that got me to laughing and it made me feel so much better. Then he said do you mind If i go fishing for a little while and when you feel better just call me. And most of all he said I dont think your crazy and I love you. He has already called me two times to check on me and I do feel so much better alreandy!! I just always hope he will be patient with me. I had one on our first date, It was horrible. I told him that I had food poisoning because I was so embarressed. Later I told him what was really up. He said is that all? is that as bad as it is going to get and I was like well that was one of the worst attacks yet. He told me remember I was with a biipolar wife for 12 years. If this is as bad as it gets, I',m here for the duration. It just is so comforting. I hope I didn't bore you I just felt like maybe you would understand.
Maybe you could write me back if you get time.
Thanks for your ear and I hope it has even been making sense. It just has helped me to VENT!!!!
Thanks Again and i hope life is findiing you well.[^]


tessa

[nomorepanic]

Tessa

You did well to laugh about the situation and diffuse the panic.

I am so pleased your partner is supporting you through this as well.

Hope you are feeling better today?

Nicola

[sal]

Hi Rach

Got your mobile number, will keep in touch with you to see how things are going.

You take care of yourself.

Love Sal xx


Dont mess up the best things in your life, just because at present you are unsure who you are.

[bluesparkle]

hi sal...
thank you it is really nice to know that someone in a similar situation is there...
although everybody on this site is great too!!!
im getting more able to answer and post things now i even went in the chat room the other night but i was a bit late but the few still in there were lovely.
ive just ben reading your posts... i hope you manage to get away and just relax...
will chat soon i hope
rach