Hi, a quick history, I have recently had flu, then got a sore boob, given a course of antibiotics, and have an all day appointment at the breast clinic Monday.
Well I thought I was doing fine, keeping my anxiety down to a minimum, coming on here for support, but last night I got a bad pain in my back, came in here and it was so bad I couldnt consentrate so left without saying goodbye (sorry!!). But then woke up with it at 5.30 this morning with the same pain.
I felt really upset, and eventhough I am scared of hospitals took myself to A&E on my own !
It was empty so within 5 mins I was seeing the triage nurse, my bp was 150/90 and she took me into a cubicle and put me on an ecg machine (that was a shock).
But then I saw a lovely young female doctor, rather than just do tests she actually spoke to me, explained how because I was run down and my fear about Monday it had prob just spiraled and set off 'real' pain. The 'breathlessness' was agreed was anxiety and we even laughed about the 'lump in the throat'. After a while I relaxed and told her that yes I was sure I had breast cancer and it had moved to my lungs, it seemed strange actually saying the words to some-one else but it made the fear 'real', I am one for keeping it in my head and not saying what is my real fear. She didnt say I was silly or a time-waster, but she asked me which tests I would like to reassure me and between us we decided on blood tests and a chest x-ray.
I had an hour and a quarter wait for the results, which wasn't easy but copeable with, but they were all fine she had even done some 'extra' ones for my liver and kidneys ! It was then approaching 8'o'clock and I am a single parent and my boys (11 & 14) would soon be waking up, so we again discussed the chest x-ray and after a thorough examination with the stethoscope we decided mutually that it would be ok to leave it.
She also told me not to worry about Monday because it didnt seem that there was a major problem there.
It was really nice to meet a proffessional doctor that understood anxiety and how it can accumilate without us knowing, she also didnt make me feel like a time-waster. The best thing was that we talked it all through and mutual decisions were made.
I still don't feel too well, but at least some of my fears have been calmed.
I am now back home with my boys, who are dreaming away oblivious of mums 'exciting' night.
Thanks for reading this and hope all your visits to A&E are as positive as mine was.
Christine xx
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(yes sounds a silly thing to say in the circumstances) but you know what i mean !
