Martin,

As I've noticed before, you are much more eloquent with your words than me and that should be something to be admired so I can't see anything unworthy in yourself.

The other words that spring out are "shame" and "stigma". Both of these can relate to career situations where people still feel the need to suffer with too stressful workloads for fear that their careers will suffer if they say anything and as a result they end up too ill to do their jobs.

Stigma with mental health has always been an issue in society. I don't know why. Is it because it's unseen or because of the stiff upper lip mentality of days of old? I'm not sure. However, I do feel attitudes are changing and people are feeling more able to share.

I think we only suffer with shame if we have no one to tell us otherwise. Just as you say, "learned to pretend normality". I always feel I'm wearing a mask, only showing a smile when inside in the past I've been suicidal. Just as they said on the News, who knows what's going on in a persons mind behind their smiling exterior.

We are All equals. We all have our limits. None of us should feel unworthy or ashamed because of anxiety. It's only what others think of us that make us feel "bad" but it's only their ignorant opinions. We are all different, that's all.

An example - you work in a team of three and know that you will be swamped with work on a certain day - you come in early that morning to prepeare. One colleague phones to say that they have broken their leg on the way in and are in casualty, then the other phones to say that they will not be in because they are feeling frightened that morning. Would your reaction (no, don't stop to think about it) be the same to each?..........

.........It would depend on what the boss was like. If he/she has suffered anxiety then they would understand each reason "equally". If they didn't, they need to be educated and the only way to educate is through public awareness and training programmes.

If a boss can't understand so doesn't support their staff properly, they won't get the best out of them and end up losing a "good conscientious" member of staff. The member of staff will just find a more understanding company to work for so it would be the original company's loss. You have to remember that anxiety sufferers hold Good traits Because of their anxiety such as being conscientious, hard working, perfectionism and of course a caring aspect to get things right. All those things are traits to feel worthy about.

It's because of this sense of shame and stigma that people are afraid to reach out for fear of being judged by ignorant people who can't understand anxiety. If the person feels alone with this, they don't know who they can trust.

This site provides a window to people to show that they are not alone and that they shouldn't feel shame. It also provides anonymity so that they can get support without feeling self-conscious about what they regard is weakness about themselves. I think it's easier to read or post on here than it is to talk to a doctor so in effect it could be a potential life saver.

I used to self harm and take overdoses, and I used to feel ashamed of the things I did. I used to feel inferior and weak compared to others who appeared more capable. These more capable people would say to me they would have left my situation years ago....so should they be considered more worthy than someone who cares?

Since my bad days I've believed in being very open because only by being open can people see that they're not alone. If people want to judge me then that's their choice but I don't believe that makes them a better person than me and from what I've read about yourself I'd say you're "very worthy" too. I don't think I'll ever forget the first post you placed in reply to one of my threads! I sure did admire your eloquence!

Anyway, I just feel that if people don't feel alone, they won't feel so ashamed and more people could be saved. I wish Everyone in the world who was suffering with stress or anxiety knew of this site because I've never come across one like it so Nicola and her team deserve the highest commendation for their efforts!

All I know is I simply hurt when I hear of wasted lives through lack of support.

I can't really add much to what you've said Donna except perhaps that this site should receive more national or international publicity to reach more people? I know it's on the Net but people still have to find it! I just hate the thought of more lives being lost that could be prevented.

What are your views Nicola?.......when you've time of course.