When do you stop being a mum????

[kazzie]

Hi Gang

Just need to vent really

My youngest son came round today for the first time since leaving home 2 weeks ago

For about 6 hours the house was full of life and laughter again

Then he went "home"

It was lovely to see him but he dident seem very happy at his descision to leave......at one point he nearly cried and left the room to go to the loo

Im sat here worrried about him and missing him again

Do us Mums ever let go or are we programmed to be like this forever

Kaz x x x

[Coni]

Kazzie I havent reached this point yet but Im sure I will some day in the not too distant future, and I cant begin to imagine how it will feel...exactly as you describe probably. I dont think we'll ever stop worrying about them and missing them...and your sons probably trying to adjust too....I remember how I felt when I first moved out of home.

Sorry this isnt really any help but sending you hugs anyway

luv Coni XX

[Karen]

Aww Kaz

I'm not a mum myself but I'd say your son is very lucky to have a mum like you who loves and cares for him so much. He'll never stop being your son or you his mum.

I am also sure he will be back to visit you often.

Personally I would love to have a mum who cared for me even half as much as you love your son

Karen xx

[kazzie]

Thanks Coni

Thanks Karen and hey Im not your Mum but I care for you as a friend......dont forget that

Kaz x x x

[SueBee]

I don't think you ever really let go and stop worrying about your children .... my mum was still worrying about me when I was 30 lol

I think you can stand back one day though and say yes, i've done a really good job as a parent and my child is independent and able to make their own way in life ....... well done you!

Personally I'm dreading the day either of mine leave home

[yorkylover]

You wont ever stop being a mum Kazz.My brother has caused my mum so much grief over the last 20 years and she is always still there for him,even after him treating her so badly.I can never understand why she doesnt cut off from him,but she say's to me "Im a mum and until you are a mum you wont understand".

[kazzie]

Thanks Sue and Ellen

I suppose I should be proud of both my sons

Dont get me wrong neither were angels lol

One did four years for armed robbery the other hit a copper and only a large fine(paid by yours truly) kept him out of nick

Now one is a top chef in a five star hotel and the other owns his own cleaning company

I just miss Rich the youngest one soooo much

You look after him for 22 yrs and suddenly he is gone

Seems Gods reward is having grandkids cos u dident kill yer own

Well got 2 of them so onward and upward I guess

Kaz x x x

[SueBee]

LOL Kaz,

Ive warned my boys that if i'm a granny before I'm 50 they are gonna suffer. They reckon I'll be in a care home by then 'just in case' so I neednt worry... kids!!

You come across as a wonderful caring mum....... just normal really

Take care

[bluebell68]

Hi ... im a mum who has recently experienced two of my kids leaving home and its really difficult.... my eldest has moved into her own flat and i do worry about her ... shes doin great but has taken on ever such a lot... it costs her a lot of money and she has had to take a second job to have any spends after bills... she says shes happy but i worry about her getting lonely living on her own... she really wanted to do this tho, shes always been so independant and so i have supported her but i do miss her..... when she moved out i had a feeling of not having been ready for her to leave... i kept thinking.. have i done enough to prepare her for this... i thought i would have more time... i guess i felt that i hadn't finished raising her yet, worrying was she ready, but im sure she is and its me who isn't..... my second daughter has moved in with her dad, which brings more worries (too long to explain why) but she knows she can come home if it doesn't work out, so i just gotta accept that she is ok... my eldest can come home anytime too but i think that she will make a go of it, so don't expect that will happen.... i feel quite sad that they have gone tho ... its the end of an era.... everything has changed... i still have a younger one at home and at least 7 years till she is old enough to leave, so i try not to think about that..... i guess what i am saying is we never stop being a mum, but we have to let go of the old ways of mothering, we loose some control when it comes to protecting them and shielding them from life and that is hard..... i think what you are feeling is totally natural and im sure that if things weren't working out for your son, he would tell you .......
Its great that he has the confidence to make his own way in life, its amazing how many kids don't even try... you have obviously done a great job ....
Take Care
xx Rach

[kazzie]

Thanks Sue

Thanks Rach

My eldest made me a Granny 1 month after I hit 40 lol I had a breakdown and ended up in the local Psyc unit

Rach I know how you feel....mine has moved in with 2 mates but is living on junk food etc I just worry

Thanks for all the lovely replies.....glad to see Im normal for once

Kaz x xx