As am agrophobic and dont go out as much as possible, pretty much because hate how it feels spend alot of time THINKING.
Going over and over things mind checking all the time and cant break free of it.
The worst is patterns patterns on the carpets curtains feel like am constantly in a spell in tranced by them, trying to organize thoughts is so hard with this carpet.
The same with the walls its a nightmare all do is try and wrestle with the consuess never coming to any ease or serenity.
Constantly fighting feelings and thoughts instead of accepting them, no matter how powerful they seem.
Am trying to find work and its not going anywhere fast and get really depressed no career or job just feel worthless even no am not.
Nothing ever seems to change its always so mundane and constant.
Am trying not to let negativity break in and take control but its so hard, am not a typical postive person am dark reserved introverted quiet.