Please Read Men Only!!!

[TidusRawlings]

Hi All,

PLEASE ONLY READ IF YOU ARE A MAN.....

Since joining NMP I have got a few things off my chest and am already starting to feel better thanks to all your support. The only other thing that bothers me at the moment (and this is really embarissing) is before I started taking my meds I used to be able to last in bed say 15 - 20 mins but since i have been taking them it all seems to be over before 5 mins!!! I am 25yrs old and take olanzapine 5mg 1 a day, Fluoxatine 20mg 1 a day, Buspirone 5mg 3 a Day and Propananolol 80mg slow release 1 a day.

When in bed i seem to be more "sensitive" while making love. Is this a normal thing? I am worried because me and my ex split up a year ago she was with me when i started these meds and it never bothered her, but recently i have had a few girls want a relationship with me but I am too scared because I dont want them to want sex and me let them down I really don't know what to do i just dont feel like an healthy 25 year old all the other men i know my age are out there having fun but I am just so worried about it, and I can't talk about it with any of them because I have always been know as one of the "guys" and i am sure they will all take the mickey. Is it the meds?, Is it me? I really don't know

[Bill]

Oh, That!!! It's been so long I've forgotten what that part of me is normally used for!!!

I'm afraid to say it's probably because of the medication but you're lucky because some medications have the opposite effect of stopping a man being able to function altogether!!!

[JennyW]

How could I not read and I'm sorry you're feeling miserable about this.

I'm no expert but I'm sure that by stressing yourself out about this is making things more worse than the meds themself. Is "loss or lack of libido" a side effect of the meds? I know it's embarrassing to talk about to your friends etc, but what about speaking to your GP?

[milly jones]

loss of libido is certainly a side effect of some meds

on the other hand my side effects mention inability to lose erection too

anx effects all our bodies in different ways too, and the more u worry about it the more it becomes a fear.

i know its hard to relax when busy, but the more u think about it the bigger the worry will become

i know im a woman too but dont tell me u guys dont look at womens only posts lol

its all part of our illness and we all want to help each other

from a womans perspective if i loved a guy then i would do all in my power to support him and help as much as possible. most of all i would ensure him that i loved him no matter what. relationships are more about emotional connection, not physical necessarily as important, for me anyway.

talk frankly to ur gp mate and use nmp for any probs

were all here to help, honest

hope u dont mind me replying

with love

millyxxx

[andie73]

Hi

Sorry I read this too, couldn't help it. It's definitely nothingto feel embarrassed about. Forgive me if I've read it wrong but I think we are talking about something other than the loss of libido. More like lack of longevity??? Well honestly don't worry if you can. I'm married and take it from me this is not something that is restricted to anxious men or men on anti d's. It is just what happens sometimes. The more you pressurise yourself then the more likely it is to get worse.

I'm goona get embarrassed now but there are contraceptive products that will help things last longer...durex do a product caled performa that may help.

If your girlfriend

[Bill]

Sorry, I keep picturing all the blushing ladies now who can't resist a peek when they think no ones looking!

I don't take any meds anymore and one of the reasons I stopped was because I got so fed up with the side-effects because they made my anxiety Worse!

I can remember some which removed any libido and particularly Seroxat that completely disabled my tools which was a really frightening and disturbing experience.

It's also true to say that the more anxious we feel, the more unlikely we are to be about to control functions just like "accidents" can happen when we suddenly feel terrified!

The most important thing to remember though is that the act can take a few minutes but love can last a lifetime beyond the point when the act becomes an impossibility. To a loving partner, it's not how long the act lasts but how long the love lasts because then 5 or 20 mins becomes unimportant.

By the way, my father used to work for a condom firm. He took me to see them being produced. The 2 things that stick in my memory are the moving metal "cows udders" being dipped and peeled, and the overpowering smell of ammonia! Just those thoughts can help to hold back!

[Trixie]

I wasn't blushing when I read it (who has ever heard of an embarrassed nurse?) But I did reply by PM.

[Cathy V]

I notice that Tidus hasnt replied yet...poor bloke was expecting more men to help him i think. hope he's ok and not too embarrassed or anxious to respond to all the replies from the ladies!

Cathy xxx

[Franz]

Um... If you think you're going to get lucky, why not have a "DIY" session earlier in the day? I used to find that helped, before I went on medication, and in the days where I actually had a sex life to worry about.

[eeyorelover]

Sorry, I keep picturing all the blushing ladies now who can't resist a peek when they think no ones looking!

I don't take any meds anymore and one of the reasons I stopped was because I got so fed up with the side-effects because they made my anxiety Worse!

I can remember some which removed any libido and particularly Seroxat that completely disabled my tools which was a really frightening and disturbing experience.

It's also true to say that the more anxious we feel, the more unlikely we are to be about to control functions just like "accidents" can happen when we suddenly feel terrified!

The most important thing to remember though is that the act can take a few minutes but love can last a lifetime beyond the point when the act becomes an impossibility. To a loving partner, it's not how long the act lasts but how long the love lasts because then 5 or 20 mins becomes unimportant.

By the way, my father used to work for a condom firm. He took me to see them being produced. The 2 things that stick in my memory are the moving metal "cows udders" being dipped and peeled, and the overpowering smell of ammonia! Just those thoughts can help to hold back!

I admit freely that I read this!
No blushing here
We are all sexual beings by nature and being willing to admit that fact can I give a woman's perspective on this?
Number one the act itself altho quite pleasurable, isn't what does it for a woman anyway!
It's the foreplay that is the best part of sex.
Women crave intimacy.
The holding, kissing and the like is what woman are attracted to.
Although the inevitable penetration is great - don't get me wrong - it isn't the end all be all that men make it out to be.

And might I add that after being married for 20 years my hubby taking the time and energy to give me a back rub or foot massage is pretty great too!!
LOL