Public Speaking

[mlondon]

I usually write in the GAD thread however I think my dilemma in this instance is more about social anxiety. I am generally ok round people, however when it comes to any sort of interview or public speaking I get terrible nervous. A couple of days ago I was in a meeting at work, there were about 15 people. I had met them all on different occassions. We were asked to introduce ourselves and give a bit of background on our experience. It didn't help that I was last as I kept repeating what I was going to say. My hands went clammy, and when it got to my turn I had totally spaced out, spoke very fast, shook and didn't say as much as I would have liked too. The girl next to me told me I sounded nervous.

In september I am going back to Uni which is going to involves presentations and I am terrified of them. I get soooo nervous. Once was having Spanish Lessons and had to do a presentation in Spanish. I prepared for weeks, but when it got to it I couldn't do it, I made up some excuse about forgetting my materials and never went back to the class.

I need to get over this. Can anyone suggest any handy hints/tips or good books to read. I am not sure what it is that even scares me!

Much thanks

[milly jones]

hi hun

im not to bad at the presentation stuff, its general chit chat that does me lol.

i prefer to always use powerpoint if possible, or at least ahve a script to rely on. this gives me a rock if things to dry up.


i also like to give handouts cos then theyre looking at paper and not me lol

i always have water and tissues lol, and i find if i concentrate at a piont in the room behind the group, i can usually get away with no eye contact.

its the question sessions at the end that i freak out at lol. i cant be in control then,

love milly xxx

[BeltaineInchy]

Hiya

I don't know if this will help but it may give you some ideas ....

When I was about 16 I was in a rock band. Somehow we managed to get a gig at a pub and the four of us played our first ever gig to about 100 people who we didn't know. Before the the first song I was shaking so much I could hardly stand in my healed boots (cowboy boots were in fashion at the time for some reason). We did ok, but the point is the stagefright of this.

That's what the panic of speaking up in front of a group is. Stagefright.
I can run training sessions for a dozen people I know and for the first minute I have to read direct from notes because I wouldn't otherwise be able to think what to say.

The point is it's only a minute. That's how long stage fright lasts (though it seems an age). Unfortunately it's a long minute, and the worst part is when doing the group intro bit you only do 20 seconds so you don't get past the stagefright bit.
BTW. I have performed seminars for over 50 managers, some of who I knew, but most I didn't, and managed to forget who I was during the intros! I've also seen consultant tutors clam up because of stagefright. It hits everyone.

So what do you do?
1) Don't sit immediately to the right or left of the facilitator (that way your never first)
2) Write down what you want to say before it's your turn. If you know this is going to happen up front (and it always does at fascilitated meetings) then make your notes in advance.
3) Keep what you say short
4) Once you have made your notes listen carefully and pay attention to what the people before you say. They will find it flattering and it will distract you from the fact you will soon speak.
5) Read what you put, don't ad-lib. Everyone else is busy writing their notes anyway so won't notice, apart from those you listened intently to, and they will be on your side now anyway because you paid attention to them.
6) If you really struggle, pretend you are someone else while you read your notes. Someone confident who does public speaking for a living. It doesn't work for me, but the suprise factor stops me panicking.

Anyway, hope that helps. Remember that any public performance is a gig, and you don't have to be you

Inchy
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[mlondon]

Thanks so much I will try those techniques next time!