Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast
Results 1 to 10 of 15

Thread: ANGER

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jul 2008
    Posts
    388

    ANGER

    Do many people suffer real pangs of anger? Anger at themselves, anger at being ill, anger where you want to rip something apart, just to release the frustrations?

    I really don't know how to deal with these feelings. My stress/anxiety/depression leaves me hardly able to face going outside, I sit and brood about being out of work and the rejection from my son. The meds make me very forgetful & confused & clumsy & tired. I'm on my 3rd session of counselling, but it doesn't feel like it's helping with anything.

    Things are not going very well with my partner. She has told me how she resents me "sitting around doing nothing". When she asks me how I'm feeling and I tell her "Not too good", it quickly turns into a competition of "Well, how do you think it is for me having to cope with all this?" Which makes me feel even more like a useless failure.

    Someone asked me the other day, what would I do if my son did get in contact, and my first instinct was "I'd tell the little toe-rag to get stuffed". I don't know how I can even face him, after the way he has behaved. The hurt is still very raw.

    I dunno if the counselling has tapped into something, as in my last session the therapist asked me what my feelings are, and I replied "Hurt, Frustration, Disappointment, Betrayal, Anger" and the more I think about things, the angrier I feel myself getting.

    I really feel as if I'm getting worse and worse. I tried to make an appointment to see my GP only to be told that he's away for 2 months. I have an appointment next week with the "Back-to-Work" people from the DWP regarding my Incapacity Bens.

    Everything just feels like it's piling on top of me, and I can feel a rage building up on a slow fuse, like I just want to lash out in pure anger & frustration.
    Last edited by kendo59; 09-08-08 at 01:50.
    __________________

    The opinions stated above are the personal opinions of the writer, and not intended to offend or denigrate any opinions held by anyone else.

    I think it's kinda funny, I think it's kinda sad,
    The dreams in which I'm dying are the best I've ever had.


  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jul 2008
    Posts
    388

    Re: ANGER

    Maybe I should go take my meds.

    *Thinks to self: "calm blue ocean, calm blue ocean"*
    __________________

    The opinions stated above are the personal opinions of the writer, and not intended to offend or denigrate any opinions held by anyone else.

    I think it's kinda funny, I think it's kinda sad,
    The dreams in which I'm dying are the best I've ever had.


  3. #3
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Location
    , , USA.
    Posts
    5,667

    Re: ANGER

    Hi Kendo,

    I've had anxiety all my life, even as a child, so I don't really know what it is like to suddenly get anxiety and/or depression. I don't know if you have had yours all your life. Sometimes I think that if you have not had it all your life then you might grieve for the life you once had. Anger is one of the steps in grieving. Perhaps that is what you are going through. I myself get very angry at times at myself because I cause myself such grief to do what comes so naturally to others. I don't get angry at my family but I do get my feelings hurt because try as they might they just can't understand some days, but then again neither do I. That being said, I still hurt.

    I do know that with therapy sometimes it gets worse before it gets better so hang in there. As for your doctor, don't they have one on-call while he is away? Good luck with your benefits and I wish you well. Try not to be hard on yourself, this stuff isn't easy.

    Take care,

    Laura
    Last edited by Southern_Belle; 09-08-08 at 01:22.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Sep 2007
    Posts
    2,744

    Re: ANGER

    Counselling brings all the bad negative supressed feelings to the surface which is why counselling can at first make us feel worse. With time though these feelings should be realeased and then we are more able to come to terms and accept the things that have caused us so much hurt.

    If bad feelings are left bottled without venting, they cause tension and anxiety. Releasing them should in time help to ease your anxiety but it does take time.

    Try not to be impatient and try not to let others and events get to you. I know using a punchbag or pillow can help to release the anger! I used to get very frustrated and angry because anxiety made me feel so low so I used to punch cushions! I also found "walking away" and avoiding confrontation also helped me because if I stayed, I only made myself feel worse without getting anywhere. I don't get those feelings so much now but it's taken a long time.

    You will get there with help so bear with it.

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Jul 2008
    Posts
    388

    Re: ANGER

    Belle, my depression/stress/anxiety only started at the beginning of this year, after a culmination of a particularly bad year last year (Full story: http://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/showthread.php?t=33423 ). Before that, I was always an outgoing, confident bloke, holding down a quite high-pressure job and I thrived on the stress. Which is maybe why I feel so frustrated and angry at myself; I hate being this way, and I'm angry at my son for his attitude toward me and 'his part in my downfall'. Literally, my life has fallen apart, all the plans my partner & I had made for getting married, working just another 5 years until the house was paid off, and taking early retirement, etc. Now we are at each others throats bickering most of the time & it looks as though I may lose the house and end up homeless.

    Yeah, I can always see another GP at the group practice, but it means having to explain yet again to someone else what my 'problem' is.


    Bill, the only feelings the counselling is bringing out in me is, what a waste of time it is. Me babbling on about the same old stuff I've had going around & around in my head for the last year, and I still can't make any sense of it. The only person who can tell me why my son refuses any contact with me, is my son. But he ain't talking, and so I sit here feeling tortured by it.
    Last edited by kendo59; 09-08-08 at 01:56.
    __________________

    The opinions stated above are the personal opinions of the writer, and not intended to offend or denigrate any opinions held by anyone else.

    I think it's kinda funny, I think it's kinda sad,
    The dreams in which I'm dying are the best I've ever had.


  6. #6
    Join Date
    Aug 2006
    Location
    , , United Kingdom.
    Posts
    832

    Re: ANGER

    Hi kendo,

    I can understand your frustration and your anger, there is nothing more frustrating than when everything seems out of our control, which your life has been for the past year.

    In fairness to your partner I think it is difficult for someone who has not been through these things to understand how dramatically someones personality can change through no fault of their own.

    I would continue with the counselling, you have only had three sessions so far and with all the losses you have experienced in the last year that would barely have scratched the surface.

    Have faith and give it time you had a lot to contend with in a short space of time; give yourself time to adjust and be patient and kind to yourself.

    Hugs to you

    Lynnann

    P.S I am known to smash plates when I get too wound up, just make sure they are dirty ones, saves on the washing up

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Sep 2006
    Location
    , , United Kingdom.
    Posts
    2,133

    Re: ANGER

    I'm very angry, most of the time.
    __________________
    http://maybeican.blogspot.com
    http://www.youtube.com/beingsarahc
    http://www.facebook.com/sarahwatson75

    Panic attacks started in 1992. 1998 i became agoraphobic which lead into being room bound. Couldn't even get upstairs. 2002 i started getting better, able to drive and work. 2005 i became house bound again. 2009 i have been making SLOW progress, still not able to go anywhere alone, but my journeys are getting longer. No where near 'normal' but at least i can go out.

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Feb 2007
    Location
    , , United Kingdom.
    Posts
    2,296

    Re: ANGER

    Not too helpful, anger. It can be helpful in rare cases but on the whole, another negative emotion along with despair, fear and hatred.

    Circumstances are always different but can lead to a very familiar conclusion, brooding and inward thinking (as I found myslef doing in the past).

    If I was ever going to offer a bit of advice, (advice, I never preach ) I would suggest that when you do find yourself immersed in all this negative thought, get up and do something, anything, paint the windows, do the dishes, if possible a walk (difficult I know if you don't feel like going outside), just do anything to distract yourself.

    I know it's probably the last thing you want to do, but it's amazing how the time goes when you get a little bit more active, and you may find you brood a little less. And on the plus side, you may get a small sense of achievement knowing that well ok, you felt terrible but you did do something.

    Good luck

    Jaco
    Last edited by Jaco45er; 09-08-08 at 09:01. Reason: Bad spelling, and it was making me angry

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Mar 2008
    Posts
    3,047

    Re: ANGER

    hi kendo, yes u r right that only your son can tell you that, but mayb the counselling can help u to deal with not seeing him etc and giving u different coping methods and make u see things a little different. please keep at it cos once u got past the going over the same old stuff etc the counsellor will start to work with u and help u. anger is horrid i had/have it its supressed inside and sometimes my head feels like its going to explode, i get cluster migranes etc. hugs and stay strong xx

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Location
    , , United Kingdom.
    Posts
    1,818

    Re: ANGER

    Anger is something ive never felt.
    I feel baffled and very frustrated with what has happened to me and whats happened to what used to be my really close family.
    My son says ive changed. In some ways thats very true. I now rely on others where as before I started with panic they always relied on me.
    But deep down im still the same Lynn and the same mum.
    I know exactly the hurt you are feeling by your son cus me and my hubby are also going thru the same hurt.
    But at the end of the day we know weve been good parents and done the very best for our children. Thats the thing that gives me the strength to carry on and not feel the anger.
    I had 6 counselling sessions and all I talked about and cried about was my son.
    Im sorry to say that at the end of the counselling sessions I felt no better at all.
    I write down my feelings then read them a few times then tear the paper up. This seems to help me.
    My biggest worry is that I will never have my son in my life again. But sadly I think this will happen. Life is very short and im way past my sell by date. I would hate to die and not be able to hear my son say I love you mum.
    I really hope you manage to sort out your problems with your son.
    If ever you to need a whinge or just vent your feelings please feel free to contact me.
    __________________
    Take care
    LYNN xx

    Laugh and the world laughs with you , cry and ? .....
    you need a bog roll. lol

Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast

Thread Information

Users Browsing this Thread

There are currently 1 users browsing this thread. (0 members and 1 guests)

Similar Threads

  1. ANGER???
    By samtheman in forum General Anxiety / Generalised anxiety disorder (GAD)
    Replies: 2
    Last Post: 04-08-08, 16:25
  2. Anger
    By MissChampers in forum General Anxiety / Generalised anxiety disorder (GAD)
    Replies: 6
    Last Post: 22-11-07, 15:13
  3. Anger
    By woofybaby in forum Depression from Panic/Anxiety
    Replies: 6
    Last Post: 20-10-07, 05:35
  4. Anger
    By Gordon in forum Health Anxiety
    Replies: 4
    Last Post: 24-06-07, 15:36
  5. Anger
    By MJDancer in forum General Anxiety / Generalised anxiety disorder (GAD)
    Replies: 16
    Last Post: 14-02-04, 09:58

Tags for this Thread

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •