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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Apr 2005
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    , , United Kingdom.
    Posts
    954

    Dealing with my issues

    Hi Everyone


    I have written a letter to my father because he has made life extremely difficult for me recently over problems i am having with my 14 year old son, and I am reluctant to send it to him, because I know that it will end our relationship, and although my guilt tells me its not what i want to do I know it is the only way I will ever get over the emotional hell he has dealt me in my life

    I have attached the letter and i was wondering if you could read it and give me your opinions!! I have gained such inspiration from you all since being on the chat room and I know you all have a good insight


    Thank you and apologies in advance for the lengthy letter



    Sue K ( With the five kids )


    Attachment: So I need councelling do I.zip ( 4340bytes )

    scknight

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jun 2004
    Location
    , , United Kingdom.
    Posts
    1,112
    Hi Sue

    I'm sure you feel better for writing that letter don't you eh!
    I don't know what to say as to whether you should send it but after reading the letter I think you know what you need to do yourself.
    I'm glad you have had inspiration from this site, me too, it's a wonderful place to come too when you are feeling down or anxious.

    Hope you get it sorted

    Take care

    Elaine x

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Apr 2004
    Location
    , , United Kingdom.
    Posts
    4,861
    Hi Susan

    I have read your letter a few times and you have definately covered how you are feeling.

    You can only decide how you feel about sending the letter, but if you feel as strong as it comes across in the letter and you feel you will gain and not lose from this, then i would go with your instinct.

    You have had a lot of losses and you have addressed them very well and we will support you all the way.

    Love Sal xx


    Dont mess up the best things in your life, just because at present you are unsure who you are.


  4. #4
    Join Date
    May 2004
    Location
    , , United Kingdom.
    Posts
    3,857
    wow Sue - what a letter!! Very well written I think!! sometimes we write letters and thinks to ourselves "I have it off my chest now and that's enough." other times after we have written it, we feel that we still need to send it. If you still feel this way, then go ahead and send it. Some people need to be told these things..

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Feb 2005
    Location
    , , United Kingdom.
    Posts
    349
    wow, what an amazing letter all i can say is "GO GIRL" your an amzing woman, i wish i could have the guts to say a few home truths as you have. well done

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Jun 2003
    Location
    , , United Kingdom.
    Posts
    8,314
    Susan,

    Its certainly a great letter to have written and you've expressed it well..

    As you asked for opinions ...

    IMHO - Ensure you can get the injunction before telling him about it as if you can't get it, that's yet something else he can use against you either directly or via the children.

    Are your prepared for any consequences of this letter which could range from him either being cold as ice and never responding or he causing as much active hassle as possible or indeed the letter coming as such a shock to him that he might collapse if he's elderly and infirm..

    I'm not trying to put you off sending it at all- just bear in mind that there iis a consequence for every action.

    Otherwise - if it still reads well in the bright light of day - Royal Mail it

    All the very best for whatever you decide to do.


    Meg
    www.anxietymanagementltd.com

    Watch your thoughts, they become your words...
    Watch your words, they become your actions... Watch your actions, they become your habits... Watch your habits, they become your character... Watch your character, it becomes your destiny...

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Mar 2005
    Location
    , , United Kingdom.
    Posts
    765
    Hi Susan,

    I have read your letter, and if you decide to send it or not im sure it has done you the world off good writing it down and getting it all off yr chest,

    have you thought of showing wendy before you send it,

    Good luck in whatever you decide to do.



    kairen x

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Apr 2005
    Location
    , , Canada.
    Posts
    37
    Hi Sue with the Five Kids!

    I read the letter too and after chatting with you last night about the possibility of getting a lawyer to help you with your current problem, I'm concerned about the letter hindering your immediate goal which is to get your son back. These types of letters are really cleansing for our souls but sometimes can come back to bite us when we least expect it. From what I read, I somehow get the feeling he wouldn't hesitate to use it to fuel his own fire. Would it be a good idea to sit on it for a while, and channel your energies into getting back with your son? I just don't want you to regret it. Having said that, if at the end of the day you decide to send it, I hope it bring you the peace you deserve and like the others, I'll support you in your decision.

    All the best,

    Sue

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Apr 2004
    Location
    , , United Kingdom.
    Posts
    4,861
    Hi Sue

    You have had some great replies to your letter.

    Have you decided if you are going to send it or are you going to take some more time so you know you are doing the right thing.

    Best of luck either way, i think you are being very brave confronting so many major issues that have happened in your life.

    Love Sal xx


    Dont mess up the best things in your life, just because at present you are unsure who you are.


  10. #10
    Join Date
    Apr 2003
    Location
    , , United Kingdom.
    Posts
    43,870
    Hi Sue

    I read the letter too. I am most impressed how you managed to get that inserted on here - I didn't even know we could do that so you taught me something!!

    The letter was obviously written from the heart and when you were very angry at him. I think you should leave it a few days, re-read it and then decide whether you want to send it still. Good luck with whatever you do.

    Nicola

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