Bowel cancer fear returned

[worriedGrace]

I really hate myself for getting in such a dreadfull state as I am in today. Just 2 months ago I was on a big high because I had just had a sigmoidoscopy and it had not shown the bowel cancer which I was convinced I had, just diverticulitis. I was so pleased and vowed never to get in that state again.
Now I am back to stage one and all because I weighed myself. All the doctors I saw when I first went with dodgy bowels asked if I had lost weight and I said that I seldom weigh myself but i didn't think I had. Then this week out of curiosity I went to Boots and got on the scales and I have in fact lost about 10/12 pounds since I was last weighed 2 years ago.
I just can't think properly or get on with any work because I am sure that if they had done a colonoscopy instead of a sigmoidoscopy they would have found a cancer. I don't know what to do. I dread going to my doctor because I have to wait 6 weeks to see him as he is so popular. Should I see someone else at the practice? In the middle of the night I was wondering if I could get a bank loan to have a colonoscopy done privatley.Why am I so weak?

[itoldyouiwasill]

People can lose weight for a variety of reasons, stress and anxiety being 2 common ones.

When GP's etc ask you about weight loss they ask you about RECENT unexplained weight loss, generally over a short period as well.

The fact that you have lost the weight over a 2 year period signifies nothing out of the ordinary, like I mentioned if you have been under a period of stress you can well lose weight anyway.

The weight loss and more specifically the period you have described should not cause you to worry about bowel cancer.

[worriedGrace]

The trouble is that I haven't weighed myself for 2 years so how do I know if I lost the weight during the last month?

[Captain America]

you'd know if you lost it that quickly. people would comment. i dropped that much in a few months and it was obvious. 3 years a ago i had one and the doctor said, 'see you when you're 50!' i'm 40 now and my fear has returned so i'm thinking of having one done myself. i know it'll be clear, but anxiety won't let me believe that!!!
i definitely know what you're going through

[itoldyouiwasill]

The trouble is that I haven't weighed myself for 2 years so how do I know if I lost the weight during the last month?

You don't!

You have to look at the facts as they are the only thing you have to go on. You weighed yourself 2 years ago and when you weighed yourself now you are 10lb or so lighter. You can only assume that you lost the weight steadily in that period. That is all you can know with the evidence you have.

As the other poster mentioned this evidence is further bolstered by the fact that substantial weight loss over a short period is noticed...you would notice in your clothes etc and other people would mention it who see you every day. When is weight loss not really noticed? When you lose it steadily over a lengthy period of time.

[countrygirl]

From experience after having a colonscopy recently I wish with all my heart that I had believed the sigmoidoscopy that I had had and not agreed to the colonsocpy. The proceedure is okay if a bit uncomfortable but the preperation day before was like nothing I have ever experienced before and would not wish on my worst enemy.

I had read lots of posts from people saying the prep was worst but until you experience it yourself you cannot begin to imagine how horrible it is.

SO please believe your sigmoidoscopy - I was told that the screening Dr's like the most for over 50's people is a fecal occult blood test to see if you have any occult blood in poo and a sigmoidsocpy and if both these are normal then stop worrying!

[nomorepanic]

I too have spoken to people who had the colonoscopy and they said never again.

The sigmoid was enough for me

Don't put yourself through these unnecessary procedures for no reason if you have no other symptoms. Believe what they told you.

If you lost 12 lbs recently then clothes would be hanging off you as well

You have no other symptoms so it is your mind playing tricks on you and not cancer at all. You would know if it was serious trust me

[worriedGrace]

Thanks for the reassuring replies. I was so worried yesterday that I ached all over from sheer tension. My husband suggested we go out for a drink so we did. I seldom drink alcohol but last night had 2 gin and tonics. The amazing thing is that the worry just went like a light being switched off and I felt great. Is alcohol a cure for worry or do you have to increase the dose to get the same effect? I have been taking medication for anxiety for the last 20 years and gin worked better than any of them. Is this a bad thing? Is all this hellish worry just a chemical that can be neutralised by alcohol?

[leonard]

Hi worriedGrace
I have been reading your posts. Firstly, if you had bowel cancer, it would show in your stools. Please accept it is your mind playing tricks with your digestive system. My wife has Chrones Disease, and I have watched her suffer for years. Perhaps you may have to look at your diet. Eat more boiled food for a time, it does help the digestive systom settle.
As for the gin, there are chemicals in gin that ease worry. I drink it and it has the same affect as it does on you. The problem is , it does not take the anxiety away, it only supresses it for a couple of hours. So drink in moderation. Hope this advice helps.
Best wishes
Leonard

[bostonbuttafly25]

hey worried grace , dont let weight loss make you believe you have cancer. ibs and other stomach and bowel problems are common and especially common for people with anxiety disorders or problems which i researched in the past for myself. if they tell you you dont have it and have done tests you dont. i know its hard sometimes especially when you feel crappy but think back have you been eating better or less, exercising or frequently going the bathroom this might be why youre loosing weight. i wish you luck definitely follow up with someone asap the longer you wait the more youll be nervous but if everything comes back okay you have to start working on not letting your mind run. mine does the same thing i worry way too much wish you luck much love, bostonbuttafly25