what triggered this ..

[so jems like]

I first started getting panic attacks about 4 months ago. It started when I started meeting this guy that i really liked and i always got nervous when i thought about it/ talked with him/ saw him .. When i think about it, my stomach hurt when i saw him couple months before my panic attacks started. My panic attack officially started when i saw him and i guess got my 'heart broken.' could this have triggered my panic attack? I feel pathetic for saying this .. that a boy triggered my panic attacks, and it makes me more disappointed in myself

i just want to know how my panic attacks began and what triggered it ..

[pooh]

Hi Jems

I'm not a doctor or a psychologist but it sounds like the possibility exists that you were already an nervous person? Being in a relationship can make us feel emotionally vulnerable and bring underlying anxieties to the surface. Why? Cause we put our hearts on a plate and run the risk of being happy and sad. Thats romance, attraction and love.
Don't feel disappointed, lots of us have been in relationships that have been hard on us emotionally. The flipside of this can be true too.

Pooh xx

[princessfreakout]

I don't think it's crazy at all. I started experiencing the symptoms of panic attacks when my husband went back to work. He had been self employed and home with me often (I am self employed as well). When he went back to work I couldn't handle being alone and began having symptoms of anxiety disorder. I agree that it has to be something that is already brewing in your system, but I think that something simple can trigger the initial symptoms. Aferall, it happened to me.

[choccy25]

Hiya,

First of all I can sympathsize. I really like a man at the moment and he is everything I would want in a guy.
But when I think about meeting up with him I go into a panic attack.

I have dated guys and during the dates have guarenteed to have a panic attack which meant I had to get up and run out with severe nausea. When I think about it I feel that maybe I am not good enough for these men. What would they see in me? If they got to know the real me they would reject me straight away?

I just know when I have a good catch and they aint getting it back with my crap personality and high maintenance emotions

[Bill]

The fear of failure, the fear of rejection, the fear of not being loved, the fear of losing, the fear of hurt.

I can remember in my teens how terrified I was about speaking to girls. I felt so self-conscious because I felt so shy and ugly. I didn't think it was possible for me to be loved and yet it was the one thing I dreamt of every night.

The more important something is to us, the more anxious we feel because the more we feel we have to lose. I think 2 of the main fears are fear of hurt and fear of rejection.

We fear hurt because we're so sensitive so we have trouble dealing with hurt. Hurt can affect us badly and can cause panics to surface due to emotional stress.

We fear rejection because to be rejected not only causes us hurt but also reinforces our own personal belief that we're "no good" and "not worthy" of being loved. That we're inferior so don't deserve love.

It "can" all stem from how we were treated by family or friends when we were young. Maybe we were bullied or ignored. Maybe we were never shown love so grew up feeling we can't be loved.

maybe I am not good enough for these men. What would they see in me? If they got to know the real me they would reject me straight away?

Often due to our past, we have such a low opinion of ourselves that we think everyone else would view us as we see ourselves but this is most often couldn't be further from the truth. We assume others wouldn't see anything in us and assume we will be rejected because our fear and low self esteem have already convinced us. We have no confidence in ourselves so can't see the goodness that abundantly exists within us.

I just know when I have a good catch and they aint getting it back with my crap personality and high maintenance emotions

"We" think we have a crap personality and "we" think our emotions are high maintenance when in reality most anxiety sufferers are Very Caring so they couldn't have a Better personality because they always need to know the person they love is safe because their anxiety makes them worry about their partner. Who wouldn't want such a caring partner? I'd be first in the queue!

We're sensitive people so we will show our emotions. Emotions are feelings which means we're capable of giving huge amounts of love and caring, even if some can't always show it in affection. Who wouldn't want a caring loving partner? Sounds like heaven to me!

What we think of ourselves can be So far from reality but we only realise it when we meet someone who genuinely appreciates all we can give. If we are rejected we look for the fault to be within us but never in the other party because again we assume it must be our fault because we have such a low opinion of ourselves.

An anxiety sufferer Cares about others. They have Alot of love to give. Why would anyone Not want the love of an anxiety sufferer? I'd give a million pounds for one because to me an anxiety sufferer IS one in a million and so richly deserves to be loved.

Never beat yourself up for being WHO you are and WHAT you are. The partner who shows they appreciate you is the Lucky half in the relationship.