hello everyone,
Had a bit of an emotional and revelationary experience today. I went for my CBT assessment, which at first I thought had gone really badly. Firstly, I discovered this morning before going that I had thrown out the piece of paper telling me where the appointment would take place. [Duh!] So ended up driving to different hospitals and asking. Finally, one woman called around and found out where I was meant to be.
So...turned up 15 min late and the guy called me in. Ed had been for CBT here is Durham and had seen a young trainee who had no idea what he was doing and proved to be useless so I didn't have much hope. I was pleasantly surprised to see that this guy was about 50 and looked like he knew what he was doing. When I walked into the room, I was surprised to see another woman there (she was the note-taker) and a box of tissues next to my seat. I thought to myself "wow, people actually come in here and cry??" Silly me. 20 min later I was sobbing my eyes out!! I had no idea that they asked such personal questions!! I ended up telling him things from my childhood that I haven't told anyone before (even Ed!!).
This may sound silly but I had never thought that these events from my childhood had such an impact on my anxiety/panic attacks. I mean, I assumed that they played a role but until this guy pointed it out, I didn't realise what a LARGE role they played. He literally sat there and connected things from my past to my present. Very scary!!
Only thing now is that I have to wait 2-4 months for my first appointment..
Sarah
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