Been on here a few days :-( feeling quite low

[Vickid]

Hi everyone.

I've been on here a few days, attentively reading everyone's personal stories and understanding how difficult it is for everyone on here.

My anxiety (if you want to call it that, because I'm convinced I'm ill).

It all started about three weeks ago, I had a massive panic attack, couldn't breath and was taken to A&E by my partner. I waited to be seen panicking even more thinking I was going to faint and the nurse sent me off with a paper bag to blow into.

The weekend went by and I felt okay-ish but still not right, then that week everything fell to peices. The breathing - THAT IS THE WORST - something i cannot cope with and I feel so fed up, especially tonight and I don't know what is going on with my body. I have been to A&E four times, seen six docs and had an ECG scan, my heart was fine, then an oxygen test, 100% circulation, and a chest X-ray, which I don't know how much a chest x-ray shows but it was clear.

All the doctors have said it's panic and anxiety but I am so so upset and worried. I can't take a full breath and I panic, even now i'm sat here relaxed and I can't breath in properly, it's so weird. I hate feeling like I'm not breathing properly, i'm always aware of it, and the nervous feeling I have everyday is absolutely AWFUL. I don't know much longer I can cope with it, seriously. :(

I find it hard to believe it is anxiety - I'm rarely stressed. I am at uni but I didn't think it was affecting me this bad. I'm so easy going normally.

any replies welcomed, x

[Cathy V]

Hi Vicki, this is obviously freaking you out badly, and if i could just point you to a part in your post where you say, "even now when i'm sitting here relaxing" well reading about how you are feeling, you are far from relaxed pet!

The thread ive read this morning points even more to anxiety, so try to believe it. It started with a bad panic attack which has obviously scared you, because they are so horrible and make people feel like they are dying, so now you dont want another one. You are not relaxed vicki, you are so tense that its affecting your breathing. Youve had an ecg etc, and your oxygen capacity is 100% so the doctor knows you are ok, now you have to convince yourself.

Try to accept that its anxiety and not concentrate so much on what your lungs are doing. The panting and sighing that you describetype is classic overbreathing and classic anxiety. Your lungs will do fine on their own. Think about when you're asleep....your lungs keep going without your help

Cathy xxx

[andie73]

Hi Vicki

Cathy is right. The doctors have done all the tests, so it is not a physical problem. These people know what they are doing, please trust them. Them more you focus on your breathing the worse it woll get. I know how hard it is. I have a different life threatening illness every day, sometimes it's breathing, sometimes heart, brain tumour or collapse. Yesterday I thought I had a brain tumour cos I had pains in my head, the fact I was sneezing and had a sore throat, isn't really consistant with a brain tumour, but that didn't register in my mind!!!!

Breathing iis the main thing affected by anxiety and panic and controlled breathing is the key, I've read, to relaxing you when panicking. Do some reading around this subject and that may help you. It's amazing how 'real' the symptoms of anxiety are cos they are real, but they are caused by an over stimulated nervous system NOT illness.

Take care.

[Vickid]

But I haven't had a blood test.... :-( I'm so scared.

When I'm asleep I'm fine, it's just getting to sleep and I haven't been able to sleep tonight with worry. I'm petrified, my mum has just booked me a flight home to Edinburgh today, as she doesn't want me to be on my own. I keep saying I have something so awful, and I am lay there in bed next to my partner crying because I can't sleep,because I can't seem to shut down to sleep, I lay there and jump every 2mins, it is really upsetting me.
I'm so scared :(

[Cathy V]

Vicki, if you are that scared then its you who is putting your body into this state...do you see? there was no need for a blood test, because you had already had an ecg and other tests, and the doc knows its only anxiety, so she thought it unecessary to take blood. You're very young for anything sinister to be going on.

I know its hard for you to sleep when you are so scared and anxious, but you say that you do eventually sleep and that you're ok when you do. This is what you're not picking up on. Your breathing returns to normal when you sleep. Its only when you are awake that you focus on it, and this makes it strained. You're so tensed up about it that you arent getting deep enough breaths. Have you taken the tablets she gave you? these might help to relax you.

Cathy xxx

[diane07]

Vicki,

Cathy is so right, panic attacks and anxiety are the worst feelings ever, they make you feel like you are about to die, but you are not. There won't be anything sinister wrong.
I remember my doctor years ago telling me that if anyone wants to know what it feels like to die, then ask someone who suffers panic attacks, the feelings of panic can be that bad, we convince ourselves that it must be something else because we can't believe that it could just be a panic.
I used to find that night times were bad for me too, but take comfort, the sooner you accept them for what they are, it will calm down and stop.
There are lots of books out there to help you, i know Dr claire weekes is a brill one.

best wishes
di xx

[Vickid]

Thank you everyone xxxx

[weeble40]

Hi and a big welcome to NMP its great to have you here, hope to see you in chat sometime,

Take care

Emma xxx

[pooh]

Hi there and welcome along to NMP

Pooh x

[milly jones]

a warm welcome to no more panic

milly xx