Fear of noisy neighbours

[bluebottle]

Hello everyone. I have complex PTSD and I have talked about this with my therapist.
First of all, it is OK to acknowledge that the neighbours are annoying. Horrible people even. However, annoying doesn't equal "fear". So if you feel real fear then this may relate to your past where you felt threatened as a child and you feared abandonment or death. Your body remembers this and each time your horrid neighbours make a noise your mind/body remembers your childhood and you are right back there. So the fear itself is related to a past incident or incidents. How do you resolve this? Well I'm still working on it, but there is a technique called Dual Awareness where you acknowledge the fear, and at the same time you look around at where you are, so you bring yourself into the present, and you tell yourself you are safe and are not going to die.

Also Boots do a earplug that keeps water and noise out. These will keep almost all noise out. Wear them when things get too much. Good luck my dear friends.

[Lucys_mum9]

Hi everyone. It feels weirdly reassuring to know that other people feel like this. This fear of my teenage neighbours is beginning to really affect my life and I'm becoming irritable with my family. Anyone available for some support?

[Search_for_solutions]

Hi

[Excuse me for my poor English]

I have/had the same problem, which I feel coud be properly labeled as a sort of "phonophobia" (neighbours); in my case, things seemed to go worse and worse with time, with increasing anxiety and bit of depression. Didnt get much help from other more conventional solutions (useful for other people).

A few months ago I decided to start solving the whole problem "my way", by starting a virtual neighbourhood-sound-self-therapy, with no bad results. To summon up, I was able to create a few mp3 sound tracks which include a variety of clips such as voices, doors, squeaking chairs, and all the usual noises I feared at home (Tools: Audacity free sound editor, + free downloaded sound clips + records I managed to tape on my own).

.
Concrete results? Though still on course. I would say about 75% fear reduction; a significant higher tolerance to common life usual noises at home; and for the first time in many years a feeling that things could improve...

I thing it is a sort of self-administered virtual exposured therapy (desensitisation?) which has been quite effective in my case.

I would like to know related experiences of other members and, of course, I am ready to share with the "know-how" of this "technique". Please let me know of your efforts , if you are trying something similar.

By the way, I am a basic-level user of computers, with limited skills in this field. That seems to be enough for our purpose.

Best greetings from

"Search-for-solutions"

[kill em with kindnes]

Alot of the time if we have expectations that our neighbours are going to be a noisy nightmare then they are. We make our experience fit our expectation so try thinking the opposite. Just nice people, doing the best they can to live their lives, not "attacking" us with their sounds (better word than 'noise) and see how your mental state improves. I've had noisy neighbours on three separate occasions. I let it make me sick, drive me mad (clinically) I retaliated, got depressed, moved house, everything. The neighbours below me now are sweethearts, but guess what? I still think they slam their doors a bit too much and hey, they might, but at least now I know the real problem is my obsessive fixation with issues of control and past traumas than poorly soundproofed door jambs. How do I know this? Because look at the things happening around you that you don't get angry about. The sounds you like or the bliss of ear-plugged silence. What's the difference between them? We choose what we like and don't like which is great news because it means we can choose what we think. If we didn't have choice we'd be furious all the time about all the sounds happening somewhere all over the world that we couldn't hear. Right? Choose to think that all your neighbours are lovely people trying their best to be considerate and watch that anxiety fall away my lovelies...peace and love to all of you

[Chickierock]

This is amazing!!! It's not just me... Nobody seems to understand the fear I have of noise from my neighbours. Compared to our previous neighbours (who we moved away from), these are better; but when they are noisy, they are very noisy. The strange thing is that I seem to actually seek out these noises. Often no-one else in the house can hear them, perpetuating the idea that I am actually going mad.

I worry about it all the time. I have been to the doctors and have been prescribed Sertraline, but to be honest this hasn't had any effect at all. I just want to run away...

I really can't take it much longer.

[bluebottle]

I have finally discovered that I am high-functioning autistic. This means you are sensitive to noise and light and infringement on boundaries etc. It doesn't mean I need antidepressants! Have you read up on autism by any chance? Anyway, I use Boots "aqu" earplugs and Peltor ear-defenders, depending on the noise. I also look for noise because the noise makes me afraid, and so I want to be in control of what my brain thinks is danger. It isn't danger. Yes it makes me afraid, but that is different. I get space when things are too bad. Walk my dog or go on my bike to somewhere peaceful.