Is anyone else like this,,,when talking to people?

[aimee87]

Hello,,,
I find when im talking to people i get so anxious i feel i have to look away and feel like an idiot,,,the longer the conversation the worse it gets especially if there looking at me for a long period of time,,,and i seem to think everything i say is stupid and that there thinking that,,,then i feel as if im going to have a panic attack and that they can tell. Its now at the point where sometimes if im out i just hope no one talks to me so i dont have to feel awkward.
Does anyone else get like it to this extent?
aimee

[alb99]

Hi Aimee, you sound exactly like me. I hate people looking at me full stop. I think my social anxiety should be called 'people looking at me phobia'. Some days I find it so hard just to put 2 words together, and like you I dread people talking to me at all if I'm having a bad day. My worry is that people are going to notice I'm dead anxious and 'weird' and that obviously makes it loads worse! I then get really upset and cross with myself for saying really stupid things or appearing really weird. The whole thing is so frustrating because you just can't relax and be yourself cos you're so worried all the time about what you're saying and how anxious and weird you look!

I felt I had to reply to you as my heart went out to you when I read your post, but I also felt a little bit more 'normal' knowing somebody else goes through the same things I do. In turn I hope you feel better knowing you're not alone.

Feel free to message me any time and we could maybe help each other x

[Patty]

Hi Aimee87 & Alb99,

I can totally relate to the way that you describe how you feel when you are talking to other people.

I worry that I'll not be able to speak or take panic attacks in front of them and they'll notice that something is 'wrong' with me. I also find eye contact difficult. It can all be so annoying.


Best wishes xx

[Lou17]

I agree, I too have these feelings. I get very agitated when its not for a short time, I bet I look quite cold sometimes, I have to leave the conversation when I get uncomfortable.

[lilly-lou]

I feel the same too and I don't make eye contact that often either it makes me feel really uncomfortable so you are not alone its all part of the social phobia.

[EmmaJane]

Me too for this one. I am exactly the same. Feel very self conscious and inferior in a way.

[Sax]

Hi Guys,

I just wanted to say a few things on this post because its exactly to the letter how I use to feel. Now don't switch off thinking 'oh someone saying yeah yeah I know how you feel when I don't' cos I honestly felt the same. I use to come here all the time mainly with social anx and depression. I've been on meds now since 1995 and only now reducing them. However, over that time I seem to have overcome the social anx part! I think its an identity crisis you have when you don't feel good enough or paranoid as to what others think of you! I've come to realise they don't think this at all in fact most people are more fussed about themselves than you so you are equal not inferior (although I appreciate this is how you feel). I don't remember the day when I felt ok to go into shops and actually speak to the assistant or give eye contact but it was gradual. If you are getting help by way of counselling or meds or both all I can encourage you is say it will come and not to worry so much about what they may be thinking about you cos they probably are thinking what they will cook for tea or things in their own lives and not about what you are saying.
Just rambling now but I hope you get what I mean............... I do appreciate how hard it is at the time though.

[bakerefc]

Im Exactly The Same Nost Of The Time! But Sometimes I Get The Courage To Want To Talk To People If You Know What I Mean! Im Scared Incase People Think Im Being Stupid Or If I Get Words Wrong Because Im Trying So Hard To Please The Person! I Cant Look At Someone When There Talking I Have To Take Glimses Of Them In There Eyes Because My Eyes Go Blurey Because Of The Anxiety!!

[freakedout]

Yeah thats me too.

I have crap eye contact when I am talking but if someone else is talking I can look at them, but then the more I look at them the more I think they are looking at me and thinking I am some kind of freak, or wierd. Then, if I am very anxious it sometimes becomes a bit surreal I think it is derealisation, or depersonalisation, things look and feel very strange. It is bizarre but I am used to it now.

Freaky

[hoppipolla]

yeah i have it sometimes too!

but only sometimes, it's weird... i dwell on it from time to time and the more attention i get and eye contact in that particular session the more uneasy i can feel! hehe

I'm not sure what the solution is, but it's probably good not to try to avoid eye contact or anything like that

Do you have it with close friends/relatives too?