death

[Prettyface110]

Is it normal to be so pre-occupied with death??? I don't mean to want to die, in fact it's the exact opposite. It's something I really fear but I don't think I'm phobic about it. I think I'm convinced that it's something that is kind of "catching" like mass hysteria or something. Like, if I was to see someone die then I would die from the sheer shock and trauma of it all. Yet I am somehow drawn to confront it. I've had a few experiences of sudden deaths and feel increasingly sensitive to the subject. It's really scary,I don't feel in control of my body!!!!!!! Any suggestions how I can relieve the dread?? I'm not religious. Is this part of it?


prettyface110

[Meg]

We've just done a thread on this somewhere ...try the search facility

Yes, it's very common but not the catching bit. Thats yours !

What have you watched or read or experienced about it ? Where's the common denominator ?

I found my neighbour dead in his garden, he'd been there 3 days .

Then my Dad died, then my friends Mum died, then a 16 yr old died in his sleep , then my cat disappeared - presumed dead. That was in 3 months.

That convinced me that it was usual to drop dead anywhere- by yourself. Took some shifting. Then there were more. 14 in a year.

I really do not want to get into the religious thing at all, but I guess it depends on what you've had indoctrinated over your lifetime.






Meg

Watch your thoughts, they become your words...
Watch your words, they become your actions... Watch your actions, they become your habits... Watch your habits, they become your character... Watch your character, it becomes your destiny...

[Prettyface110]

How do you un-convince yourself?? It's really getting me down as I'm constantly in fear of it happening to me or my loved ones.

prettyface110

[sadie]

Hi Prettyface

You have the exact same fears as myself. I too constantly worry about dying or someone close to me dying. Mine has gotten slightly better over the last year or so but it is still constantly with me. I read in a book that one woman who had this fear was told by the doctor that she only had months to live and was dying of a brain tumour. Once the woman was told this then she realised how stupid she was and lost her fear...dont think that would work with me though!!

The only way to loose your fear I think is to really understand your anxiety..what causes it , what makes it worse and how to control it. Easier said than done..I know as I have suffered anxiety for 3 years. However, there are lots of people who have had the same fears and managed to control their anxiety and lead 'normal' lives.

There is lots of help and advice on this forum which should help you understand and cope better with your anxiety. Maybe you should visit your GP and ask for some counselling and CBT which will definetly help you.

Keep in touch

sadie

[Samantha]

if you understand why you have the fear, how can you shift it? Does councelling really work?
Sam

[Lottie32]

Hi Sam

My friend suddenly developed an immense fear that she was going to get cancer and die.

She went to the doctors, and they said she was perfectly healthy.

She was still convinced. Eventually it got out of control and she became agrophobic, suffering panic attacks and anxiety.

She went back to the doctors who put her on a course of Prozac, and sent her for counselling and CBT.

She is now back on track and living her life as she had before she developed this fear.

In her case CBT and counselling definitely worked!

Surely it's worth a try

Charlie

[Samantha]

I no its worth a try its just i feel uncomfortable talking about my feelings in front of ppl, coz i feel as though theyre judging/laughing at me, i find it hard 2 walk infront of ne1 let alone talk 2 them, but i no i should give it ago.
Sam

[Laurie28]

Sam,

CBT was not how i expected it to be. you don't have to totally open up to your counsellor just tell him/her your fears (I know that makes no sense at all)
You don't have to go racking in your past it is about the here and nows. you create a diary with anxiety/panic ratings and see how you get on with giving yourself lttle tasks to do to disprove the irrational fears you have.

love
lucky

[Samantha]

thanks lucky, i goin 2 c her wed so i suppose ill neva no if i dont give it a go.
Sam