failed my driving test... again

[henri]

hi everyone,
just wanted to have a quick moan. i just failed my driving test again. it's the second one i've had since i started learning to drive in october last year, but the fourth one i've had in the last 11 years.
to quote michael winner in those stupid insurance ads, i'm actually a very good driver. my instructor can't understand why i keep failing. but as soon as i see the examiner and get into the car with him i totally totally freak out. i just can't bear it and drive like i only learned how to do it yesterday.
today i took 2mg of diazepam before setting off and it definitely helped to calm me down a bit (my left leg wasn't shaking as it normally does). but then he asked me to park in a narrow road - there were three cars queued up waiting for me to complete the manoevre so they could drive past. i got nervous and totally screwed it up.
anyway, it's depressed me so much today. i don't think i'm ever going to pass and i really really want to. any tips on how to overcome the fear?
sorry for rambling on,
henri x

[denni]

I know exactly how you feel mate. Took me 6 attempts to pass my test, but don't give up!
I used to go to pieces when l saw the Examiner, but eventually ended up with a really nice one who chatted to me all the way through, so there is hope!

Denni x

[jill]

Hi Henri,

So sorry to hear you failed your driving test:(
A friend of mine who suffers PA, anxiaty went through the same
thing. Try not let it depress you so much, you have to think positive
Henri.
( I don.t think I'm ever going to pass ) negative.
( I really want to pass and I WILL ) positive.
As I said to my friend if they thought you could not drive, they
would not have put you in for your test.
I also told ther that she needed to get an attitude, if cars were waiting
for her to do a manoevre say to herself " they will just have to bl**dy
wait" She passed 3 weeks ago [^]
YOU CAN DO THIS HENRI.

TAKE CARE

LOVE JILLXXX

If you believe you can, you probably can.
If you believe you won't, you assuredly won't.
Belief is the ignition switch that gets your
off the lounching pad.

[henri]

thanks jill and denni. i've cheered up a bit about it now. fingers crossed for next time, eh?!
henri x

[Meg]

I had a friend who opted after 4 failures to take an intensive weeks course in rural wales and take the test there at the end of a week.

She hardly saw a car at all during the test- just a few interested sheep and passed easily.

I did mine in London too and it was no fun with people beeping whilst you did your 3 point turn and that was 22 years ago.



Meg
www.anxietymanagementltd.com

Watch your thoughts, they become your words...
Watch your words, they become your actions... Watch your actions, they become your habits... Watch your habits, they become your character... Watch your character, it becomes your destiny...

[angieb]

Hiya Henri

So sorry to hear your glum news :-(

Do you start the test with a PMA - positive mental attitude, you know when you wake up, "today is the day that I pass my test" etc etc or do you start with "oh no driving test day, bet I fail again"?

Perhaps book your next one TODAY and say this is it this time, I am going to do it next time and enforce those thoughts and visions into your head to help you relax about it.

Just a though - it worked for me albeit 20 years ago, I failed my first booked my next for four weeks later and was determined that I would not fail.

Good luck next time hunny - you will do it

[Karen]

Hi Henri

It took three attempts for me to pass too as anxiety always hit me as soon as I got in the car with the examiner, and I had a gap of about 3 years between my second and third tests as I couldn't face trying again.

However, eventually a change of job forced me to put in for another test as I needed to drive to get there. On the day of the test everything that coud go wrong did, including my instructor's car being involved in an accident a few hours earlier, meaning I had to take the test in my clapped out of Metro!

I think up until that day, whenever I had made a tiny mistake on the test I went to pieces, catastrophising and believing I had already failed. For some reason that day, I managed to hold it together and carried on doing my best in spite of the mistakes I thought I'd made and I passed.

So don't give up Henri. You will get there.


Karen



It is not easy to find happiness in ourselves, and it is not possible to find it elsewhere.

[alexis]

Hi Henri, sorry you did not pass, Ill tell you now, if I had to park between two cars on my test Id still be learning today 23 years on. You will do it, when my first one was cancelled due to bad weather, but Id done the dummy run with instructor and messed it up, I decided on a lesson a day for the week leading up to the test, I looked at my examiner and tried to see him as an equal, remembering he had the same needs as we do, (guess?) it made me feel much more confident and I passed, take care, Love Alexis,x

[kairen]

Hi Henri

Sorry you failed yr test, i passed 3rd time, my first time i wasnt to bad, but pulled out on a bus lol so that was that, my second tes i was a bundle of nerves, could hardly hold the clutch in fact stalled it 4 tiomes in a row, just wanted to get out of the car and run, but the 3rd time i just thought i can do this i know i can and i just pretended i had my mum in the car instead of that awful man lol, and i passed that was 15 years ago and like alexis i was never taught to parallel park and im sure i wud still fail on it today lol
bit the bullet book straight away, dont give up

good luck for next time


kairen x

[clickaway]

hi henri,

sorry mate, but its just a hiccup I assure you!

I passed my test on my sixth or seventh attempt - at the age of 42 lol

I guess it was nervous disposition that prevented me from getting there earlier - I was a very spasmodic driver when learning and I was also nervous. Now, I'm more of a free spirit, although I'm not sure that's totally useful lol

Your anxiety is surely not helping but keep plugging away.

Incidentally, when I did pass it was at 3.30 pm when the roads were pretty busy and I found that an advantage.

Cheers,

Ray



Don't wait around for other people to be happy for you. Any happiness you get you've got to make yourself.--Alice Walker