Advice please!!!

[Samantha]

I know this is gunna sound stupid but i need sum advice!

My ex has been in contact wiv me askin wot im doin dis weekend, n i no dat he wants to meet up but how do i reply to his txt. The last time we went out was in April n it lasted about a month, i ended it, sayin dat i wanted to remain frends but evrytime i see him its awkward and one of his m8 keeps telling me dat he loves me. Its not that i dont like him coz i really do care bout him, but wen we did go out evry1 at skool pestered and constantly laughed at me, i no i shuldnt care wot ova ppl think but wen u get it evryday 4 9hours u begin 2.His surname panther and as u can imagine i got a lot of stik 4 by being called samantha panther.
The last few months i have been feelin really low/depressed n i dont enjoy goin out nemore i constantly make excuses 4 not goin out wiv my frends, i just like 2 stay at home. I just dont need a relationship on top of evrything dats goin on rite now, but he doesnt want to remain friends he wants more:(How can i explain dis 2 him wivout hurting his feelins?Plz help

Sam



Positive thinking is the key to the future, if ne1 finds it let me know!

[sarah]

Hiya Sam

1st of all does he know whats going on with you right now with the depression? If so you could explain to him why you dont need more aggro right now.
If not, and i can understand why you dont want everyone to know, you could just tell him you are both young and you dont want a heavy relationship. You dont have to be nasty with him or anything but at the end of the day you should do what you want. If you dont want a relationship, dont have one just because he wants it. Your feelings count too you know!!! If he cant just be friends then he cant be the nice guy you think he is. If he respects your feelings he will put up with being friends rather than lose you altogether.
If you do want to see him, do! Ignore people at school and just do what you want and have fun babe!!
Concentrate on getting yourself better before you get into anything heavy.
I hope this helps hun.

love Sarah
xx

[stephen]

hi sam .stay strong !if you dont need a relationship then thats cool. your ex will,or ,at least,should understand .sure its gonna be difficult for him but he,s lucky to have you as a friend.i know its not easy (even for us old folk ,lol)but your real friends will come through at the end of the day.just concentrate on yoursef for now .it will come right and keep telling yourself -i,m one lovely lady !because you are ! tc stephen

[Samantha]

hi stephen and sarah thanks for your advice, i couldn't face explaining evrything to him so i just made an excuse. i no eventually ill have to face up to evrything but at the moment im just gunna concentrate on wot i need 2 do formeself bfore i start thinkin about dating sum1, i just dont need d pressure at d mo.
Sam

[Laurie28]

Hiya Samantha,

I think if that's what u want to do then you have chosen correctly.
At 16 it is very difficult to 'stand out' from the rest of the teenagers and if they are making fun (even if it not in a particularly nasty way then it is best to go with your gut instinct. Explaing to a 16 year old boy about depression (i think) would be very difficult as at that age they can be immature (i'm not saying he is but that he might be!)

I think choosing to look after yourself and get your head straight and life back on track b4 persuing a relationship is a good idea espacially if u are not that keen about him anyway

I hope that made some sense

Take care
Lucky

[Samantha]

Thanks Lucky, but i think dat at sum point in d new year ill hav 2 xplain it 2 him in the last week ive had 4 txt mssages from him, n 1 of them woz quite freaky. Its as though hs not listening n trying 2 b like evry1 else, at the mo im tryin 2 ignore my phone, but if things r still awkward in the new year ill hav 2 say summin.

Sam

[nomorepanic]

Sam

I hope you can sort it out with him. I am not sure how mature he is and whether he will understand how you feel or not. You don't want to tell him and then he makes fun or something as that will make you feel worse won't it?

Good luck and let us know how it goes

xx

Nicola

[Samantha]

Thans evry 1, ill giv it a go, mite work out 4 the best!

Sam

[Laurie28]

Hiya Sam,

Good luck talking to him if you think that is for the best. Let us know how you get on

Love
lucky