just lonely

[kinky_hobbit]

I feel sort of pathetic posting a thread here because my reason for feeling low isn't really that major, I just feel like I have no one to talk to at the moment really

I'm trying my best at making new friends, but I'm so paranoid and anxious of being unworthy, of just not being good enough that I'm finding it really hard to keep upbeat with them and just laugh, and because of that I go all stiff and weird on them and push them further away which just makes it even worse.
I can't tell them about my anxieties to them because I'm scared I'll just be considered pathetic and get outcasted by them. It's not like they're bad people, they're really nice, but I haven't known them long enough for them to accept all aspects of me. They already find it weird that I sigh constantly and that when we go out I have at times to sit alone for a while because my heart is making a bid for freedom through my ribs. It woudn't really come across well if i told them that the reason is because I'm terified of not fitting in and simply of just trying to be happy around them >_<

I want to be a happier person. I want to be considered fun to be with and I've tried so hard over the years but I can't stop being so anxious all the time. I've tired Propranolol and Diazepam but they don't really stop me from feeling anxious just how my body reacts to it.


I'm sorry if that came across as terribly whiny, which it probably does
just wanted to rant a little

[kinky_hobbit]

thank you tetley

[NoPoet]

Hi, it sounds like your problems are being caused by self esteem issues and a general lack of confidence. Medication won't change that. You need to look within yourself for the answers.

You come across as a decent and intelligent person. It is highly likely that you give others this impression in real life. Improvements to your self-opinion don't happen overnight, it is a gradual process which takes a while.

I recommend starting by thinking positive thoughts when you go to bed. Think about what you WANT to happen, rather than things you don't. This is how I got started and it totally transformed me.

[kinky_hobbit]

It's true medication probably won't help me :( just I guess it was nice to hope that there would be something there to fall back on. I am trying hard to become more confident, just a lot of the time it feels fake and I get exhausted trying to become this better person all the time, when i get bad like this all I want to do is sleep and hide, but then I get behind in my work and end up making myself feel sick because I push to finish everything just before deadlines >_<

This may sound silly but I'm sort of superstitious, I always plan ahead for the worst because I have this weird belief that if I believe that I will do well I won't, cos some higher being will muck it up cos of me being too cocky about it which is stupid I know. I'll try thinking more positive thoughts

did you suffer from low self-esteem to?

Hi, it sounds like your problems are being caused by self esteem issues and a general lack of confidence. Medication won't change that. You need to look within yourself for the answers.

You come across as a decent and intelligent person. It is highly likely that you give others this impression in real life. Improvements to your self-opinion don't happen overnight, it is a gradual process which takes a while.

I recommend starting by thinking positive thoughts when you go to bed. Think about what you WANT to happen, rather than things you don't. This is how I got started and it totally transformed me.

[Deepest Blue]

Sending you loads of hugs your way I hope you feel better soon although I do know what it's like to feel lonely, but we are all here for you if you need to talk to someone.

Take Care.

[Southern_Belle]

Hi,

One thing you can do is try to help two more people on the forum and then go into our chat room and there will be loads of people to talk to. Many here have made friends that way, it is a start. Huge to you and you are worth all the friends in the world.

Love,

Laura

[melody]

Hi,

I think lowly of myself. My memories play tricks on me. My friend/acquaintances say different. I truely dislike who I am mostly. It's mean! It's a fear thing I think! Ignore the mean things u think about yourself

Melody

[NoPoet]

Hi Kinky Hobbit, I used to have big problems with self-esteem. Sometimes I still do but mostly I'm all right. I get lonely though, I feel it at times like now when all my friends are doing other things and my family are all occupied. The only solution I can think of is to do something relaxing that you enjoy! Listen to music by lamplight or candle light, read a book with the television on low or some music playing, get on your Xbox, phone someone or send them an email, or even just sit back, enjoy the quiet and spend some time doing relaxing breathing exercises to bring some inner peace