Flying Phobia

[Holly2009]

I am so relieved to have found this site. I have been reading some of the other posts about fear of flying etc.. and I feel like I am searching for answers that possibly don't exist.

I am due to fly in 2 days, the flight is 2.5hrs to Spain. For months and months I have working myself up about this. I have been to a hypnotherapist, and although I have been making good progress with this - I have not made enough progress to want to fly! (because I have been working on other situations where I panic too)

I have been prescribed diazepam by my GP, last time I flew was 4yrs ago on a very very short flight (20 mins) and that was a right performance! And I took a diazepam!

I don't feel like I can get on this flight on Sunday and I feel so depressed about this. My partner booked it (knowing I do not like flying) and he is going anyway.. this just makes me feel worse about myself. I also think.. how can he do this to me? I asked if we could cruise there and he said no.


I fear I will lose control on board/go crazy beyond the point of return! I don't know what to do, or how to get over this. I don't like the feeling of being trapped in, so high up.

[katy20]

hi

i also have a fear of flying both when im flying or when close family members and friends fly. But i refuse to let it stop me going away in order to relax! My best advice is to take loats of tings to distract you on board - books, mp3 player, puzzle games- anything that you can focus on. Even if you do start to feel uneasy it is only a 2.5 hr flight and it will be over quickly enough. i also find that if i can tire myself out & fall asleep on the plane by the time i wake up we've landed and i can enjoy my time away,
i do find that others dont understand my fear of flying as its not actually the flying that concerns me. But dont make yourself feel worse just because your partner doesnt understand your fear.

Hope you enjoy your holiday
Katy20

[Wee-Mee]

Firstly, hugs

I have "given" myself a fear of flying if you like..

I haven't flew alot of times but in the past when I have flew,I actually LOVED it! Loved flying..then...when I started having other problems I would stay in the house and watch the documentary channels where I discovered one about air crashes.. Well..yeah.. I now probably know every piece of metal in the making of an aeroplane and can't get anything out my head.. My 3 close friends are away in 11 weeks to New York for 2 weeks and I feel like I'm missing out. I would LOVE to have went. But when I tell them that I made myself scared of flying they laugh at me. :(

It sucks..I feel I will never be able to try other places now. I sympathise greatly with you on this one hun. Katy gave you good advice though about distractions. xxxxxxxxxx

[Little Miss Anxious]

Hi katy

I went through this for years I flew as a child when my parents took me away & had lots of holidays in my teens where the flights were no problem at all then a fear of flying suddenly kicked in & I flatly refused to board an aircraft between the ages of about 20 to 28. Eventually I got fed up of being left at home when everyone else was away enjoying the sun, sea, sangria & fun. About 7 years ago my mates booked a holiday to Spain that once again I refused to go on, a week before they went I was really fed up hearing how excited they were & had this overwhelming urge to join them so booked on late & flew out alone !! I was in bits, a complete wreck before the flight but I wouldn't have missed that holiday for the world. Since then I refuse to let my fear stop me, I will never like flying, I am getting gradually better & the fear has become more like anxiety - I am uneasy & restless instead of completely terrified (I dont sob uncontrolably anymore before boarding, lol !!) I have now flown long haul (14 hours last year, 10 hours this year) & my husband is wishing my fear would come back as I am wanting more extravanant holidays now I have a taste for seeing the world.

Just focus on what you will be missing if you don't go !! When that plane lands safely at that nice hot holiday destination you would be stuck here wondering what it would have been like if you'd gone. As someone who has been through this I completely understand how you feel but it would be sunch a shame to miss out.....go on, go for it & have a great time !!!

By the way, have a look at flyingwithoutfear.com website they have lots of little video's with cabin crew & pilots explaing the things that make us nervous (different noises, turbulance etc) & how for them all these things are just in a days work - its helped me a bit.

Good luck xx

[sandradee]

Hi there,

Some very helpful replies, and like Little Miss Anxious says, don't let it stop you from the pleasure of a nice holiday. tell the panic to clear off, and don't focus on where you are going but where you want to go.

This is from someone who has gone from being frankly scared on planes (older than you and never holidayed abroad) to tolerating it quite well, to get where I want to go.

good luck

[KR]

Hi Holly,

I have the same problem - I don't like flying either but I so want to recover because I love going on holiday! Like Little Miss Anxious, I went on tons of flights with my family etc, and in my early 20s used to fly all over the world, long-haul to Australia, America, wherever, without batting an eye-lid - then I had a panic attack which turned into this travel anxiety that I have now.

I went on a Virgin Fear of Flying course a couple of years ago - they talk to you in the morning and then you all get on a flight in the afternoon. I was actually fine, I enjoyed the flight (25 mins). That was about 2 years ago though and I haven't organised another flight to see what I'd be like.

My problem isn't that I'm scared the plane might crash, it's just the feeling of being so high up and that there's no escape if you start feeling anxious. I have a problem with getting on the tube as well because it's the same kind of thing - not being able to escape if I start feeling awful.

I'm not an anxious person in other areas in my life, just travelling, it's so annoying!!

Maybe just accept that you're going to experience some anxiety during the flight, but YOU CAN COPE with that, that it won't last forever and it'll be so worth it!

Have you got a relaxation CD which you can take with you on the flight? I'm sure you can download something from i-Tunes if you have an ipod.

Are you flying with Virgin? I think they have a special channel on their TVs for nervous flyers dedicated to calming you down.

If you ever want to go on some shorter flights around the UK, just for practise etc, let me know, I'll come with you!!

Good luck, let us know how you get on.

ps. sometimes if I'm on a long journey somewhere I log on to nomorepanic on my i-phone and I find it really reassuring - I wonder if you can do that on planes, I'm sure it would help.