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Thread: fear of dying

  1. #1

    fear of dying

    hello i am new here im nineteen years old and ever since i can remember i have been afraid of dying i started having these panic attacks in childhood i would get very short of breath and my mother would have to calm me down i also find that i am afraid of getting older because that eventually leads to death i am agnostic so i do not believe in an after life not because i would not like one but because i dont think there is one how do you reconcile with the fact that you will grow older and one day cease to exist

  2. #2
    Join Date
    May 2009
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    702

    Re: fear of dying

    I too have had this fear for a long time, i think it really appeared when i had my son 17 years ago, i used to think of it from time to time like everyone else, then bam, it took over, it felt like i had just been let into the biggest secret on earth, if that makes sense.. i still have that fear today, and so does my son, he is 17 and has panic attacks thinking about it too.

    The only way i know how to deal with it, and i tell my son the same thing, is that.... ok... but we dont have to think of it right now, and i try to push the thought away, and go and do something, anything to get my mind away from it even for only a short time... i dont really know how else to try and get rid of it..

    If anyone else can share any tips or ideas on this subject that we be good for me too, im sure we are not alone on this one....

    wish i could be of more help

    P x
    __________________
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  3. #3
    Join Date
    Jun 2009
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    408

    Re: fear of dying

    I have this fear too. I think it all stems back to my brother getting killed 10 years ago and then not long after that a someone had a heart attack at work and had to be resusated by staff in front of me. From this i convinced my self something was going to happen to one of my boys normally they have been stabbed or something when they are out and then i started thinking i was going to dye. Its getting a bit better now but its horrible as sometimes i even have imagined my own funeral. But like i said it has got a bit better now
    denise

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Jun 2009
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    36

    Re: fear of dying

    I also get anxiety over death but I try to tell myself the following things to keep it in perspective.

    1. I was dead before I was born and it wasn't something I was aware of or was fearful of - then or now.

    2. The alternative to death is immortality. You would likely see some of your loved ones die in accidents, witness World War III, or the end of the world. The world would be horribly overcrowded and the planet wouldn't cope.

    3. In the next 90 - 100 years, just about everyone currently alive will be dead. All our favourite role models, singers, actors, family and freinds will go through the same thing. There is comfort in the fact that my death will be the same as yours and everyone elses.

    4. Science always chooses which questions to answer and tends to avoid the difficult ones. We simply don't know if there is an afterlife or what happens after death - this is encouraging to me because it leaves the door open for the possibility of meeting up again with all the people I love. Science has a long, long way to go yet before it has all the answers.

    My death anxiety always seems to hurt when I'm in the wrong state of mind - at other times I can accept death and make the most of each day. I do think that there may come a time late in life when it is possible to welcome death.

  5. #5

    Re: fear of dying

    I too fear death, but since my Dad died on Christmas Day 2007, my attitude toward death has changed. He was finally at peace, looked like he was asleep, and was just ''gone''.
    His funeral was a proper goodbye and i hope mine will be like that. I think we all, especially those of us with anxiety and depression, have sensitive souls and the thought of everything ending can be so fearful.
    My experience of someone elses death has helped my phoba fade into more of a ''back of my mind thought'' if you know what i mean.
    I'm sure death is less feared if people have belief and faith about afterlife, but i am atheist so i assume i will return to the same condition and place where i was before i was born. i did not fear that so i cannot fear death.

  6. #6
    Join Date
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    2,460

    Re: fear of dying

    this has been my biggest fear phobia since i was 6 years old when my grandad died, Im now 40, I still havent found any answers or learnt how to cope with the fact that yes one day I will die, (god it sends me into panic typing that), I have however learnt to live each day as it comes and make the most of it, I live hard, play hard, I try to lead a normal life and keep this thought to the back of my mind, but sometimes it pops up to bite my bum, I work in a care home for the eldery and on more than one occassion sat with and waited for someone to pass, its not scarey or frightening, in fact its quite peaceful, am I still scared Yes, my wonderful Dad died last year, and I do seem to of calmed down alot since then, as if with his passing he took my fear with him, he wasnt afraid, and if my dad can do it then so can I, I live in hope that when my time comes those I have loved and lost will be waiting for me, so many questions, I guess they will never be answered, Im not sure if its fear of the unknown, Im just glad that Im not alone in this, please feel free to PM me anytime, and take care all

    Emms xxxxx
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  7. #7
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    Re: fear of dying

    I have this fear and I fear there being a nothingness

  8. #8
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    Re: fear of dying

    I have been thinking about this again. I fear being old and not being able or I fear never coming back again it seems awful. I worry we have such a limited time here and there may be nothing after you die just nothing?

  9. #9
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    Re: fear of dying

    Anybody help? The opposite is I freak out about the feeling of being alive?

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Feb 2015
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    627

    Re: fear of dying

    Acceptance is key in overcoming a fear of death. Trust me, I have struggled with this one for several years now. I'm 32, in apparently good overall health, but it's not about "now." My fear always comes down to the inevitable time, no matter when - whether it's 30 years or 70 years from now. That thought of literal "nothing", for the rest of eternity. But when you're gone, you know nothing of it. "You" cannot be, thus you cannot care. I know that's extremely difficult to grasp, and quite frightening, but that's the reality of it.

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