Terrified of Driving

[gary_2.0]

The best advice I can think to give is, 'don't believe the hype'. The media loves to play up conflict so only skim off the worst of society and attempt and scare us half to death to keep us buying their newspaper or watching their news reports. The very much have their own agenda.

I used to drive an awful lot and covered a wide area of the country in my job, but never saw anything which reflected the apparent anarchy which was happily exposed by the press. In fact I can't recall witnessing anything of significance. Don't assume we brits are quite as sedate and polite as our legend may have it either. Heh.

Another important aspect worth mentioning is, that it takes a certain type to become involved in any kind of conflict. Just as a pub brawl usually begins with an exchange of comments and dirty looks, as people size up to each other, so any incident on the road follows a similar interaction, with neither party wanting to back down prior to anything kicking off. Obviously there are exceptions, and 'what-ifs?', but so there are with everything in life.

I honestly don't think you have any real concern, it's just one's natural fear of the unknown. A good instructor will allay you of your worst fears too.

I actually think your age is an advantage too. I think I was into my thirties before I learnt to drive. Ultimately the feeling of independence one gets from being mobile is wonderful, it really is, and I strongly urge you to battle those fears and do it. I wish you the very best and please let us know how you get on or need more encouragement.

[LookingForLight]

Gary_2.0
I really appreciate your advice. There definitely is a lot of hype in the media! What has added to my anxiety is being a regular passanger in a car with a fairly aggressive driver who has no qualms about "getting into it" with other drivers (verbally that is). Each incident just increases my tension levels... and then it just seems like a "war zone" out there!

[Worrier]

Hey Lookingforlight,

I just say GO FOR IT. What do you have to lose? And the sense of independence you will feel when you can drive yourself will be amazing.

After driving in the UK for 12 years I moved to the US and had to retrain myself to drive on the other side of the road. Interesting lol. I still don't like to drive the highways here but just had to do it because you can't live here without being able to drive. Everything is just so spread out.

Also I had to drive 1400 miles on the highways when we moved and I was so worried about I just thought I could never do it, wrangling on the road with all the trucks and crazy drivers. But of course I did it and it was okay.

Stay positive and just think of all the places you will be able to take yourself to when you get your license.

Good luck
Natalie x

[LookingForLight]

Thanks Natalie for the boost of confidence!

[melancholia555]

I have a phobia of driving, i am in my 20's and i already get people asking me about it.. its kinda stressful. I hope everything turns out well for you...

[Bluebelle]

I have had a fear of driving and sometimes it was so bad I couldn't even be a passenger !

I have started driving again out of neccessity as my regular 'driver' is no longer able to help me -similar to your situation.

I was two horrible car accidents and I have an extreme fear of vehicles. I could barely sit in one at the start ! I began just sitting in the vehicle and listening to the radio for about 5 minutes a day and just gradually increased my time. Anyway I haven't driven in more than 10 years and I started driving in the quiet times while listening to classical music. At first I would just drive a short distance to an empty parking lot and then when my anxiety subsided I would drive home.

It has helped and whereas I wouldn't have believed it possible 6 months ago-I am now able to go on errands myself. I am trying to get as much experince in driving before the snow and ice start -that is going to be another challenge.

I am now taking short trips on highway 401 going into Toronto. Most people in my community are unable to drive on this highway so I feel comforted in knowing that I am not alone in my fears.

You'll be amazed how quickly your anxiety levels drop once you get going in the vehicle. Even just driving around an empty parking lot helped me. I approached the whole thing as thorugh I was learning to drive for the very first time and tried different parking techniques.

Another facet of my driving fear (besides being in an accident, ruining a vehicle, possibly hurting someone ) was I terrified of upsetting my fellow drivers. I try and tell myself I am never going to see these people (in the other vehicles) again so I shouldn't be as concerned. My sister also stressed to me that if someone had a problem with my driving they would pass me-so I shouldn't worry about them-just worry about your own vehicle.

I hope you feel more comfortable about getting into a vehicle as a driver-it is so hard but you can do it!

Love-Bluebelle

[LookingForLight]

Dear Bluebelle,
Thanks so much for taking the time to share your story with me. It was very encouraging! I really appreciate the support and I wish you well.
Love,
LookingForLight