Cultural adjustment help: new in UK flatshare etiquette

[heavymind]

Hi,

I have recently come to UK and have found a flatshare acco to stay in.
I have been in UK 5 years back for around 5-6 months and at that time
the living room was shared other than the room where we stayed. Every
one used their own cooking utensils and cutleries.

In the new place I was surprised to find that cooking utensils and cutleries
where shared too. I used to go to the living room and sit watch TV while
eating, its 10 days since I moved in. Only today my live-in land lady told me
the TV room was only for her and her husbands. She was polite to ask
if I wanted a TV on my room, I said no, and she said normally the other
lodgers do not use the TV room. I said okay I will keep it that way. While
leaving the room, I said "Thanks for telling me, sorry about that".

Should I have realized by myself by noticing the other lodgers do not go
to that room? Will I be seen as somebody who invaded the privacy. I some
times go blind in understanding from peoples gestures.

Since I am new to the UK, I want to be sure, I am not mistaken. Is there
something else that I should have told? what is the general flatshare
culture here in UK, does it vary largely. I find in UK people seem to not
tell thing on the face, onlike in cultures I am used to. I have been in India
and in the US and I find that people tell on the face on day one. Here
why to people take such a long time to tell. That gives a false sense of
everything else alright, while things may not be.

Regards,
Ram

[doodah]

Hello Ram,

House or flatsharing rules vary really. It would have been better if your landlady had told you the rules when you moved in. My husband and I used to let rooms to lodgers - they would have their own bedroom and share the living room/tv room/kitchen with us - they would have their own cupboards to keep their food in etc but would share cooking utensils and plates etc.

If you're still not sure what the rules are where you're staying, maybe you could ask your landlady to repeat them and say you're a little confused?

Hope you manage to get things sorted out.

Wendy

[Gregor]

Hi Ram,

I agree it would have been better for your landlady to point out the rules when you moved in. However, dont feel bad for getting it 'wrong' because there isnt any 'normal' way of these things. Rules generally vary dependant on who or where you live, etc.

You didnt do anything wrong - if you werent told at first, then you're not to know.

[heavymind]

I have hardly move in 12 days back and today the land lady tells me, she has decided to sell the house and asked if it was okay for somebody to come see my room!!!!!.

I cant imagine they let me in and in such a short time decide to sell the house.

I am feeling anxious about having to find another place and move. She
didnt tell me you have to move or anything, so I can wait untill she tells
me right? Should I start finding another place right away...

[doodah]

It may be worth you visiting the Citizens Advice Bureau to see where you stand legally. I don't now much about this side of things but I would think they have to give you a decent time to find somewhere else!

good luck.