a bit worked up again

[LisaLisa]

I have been feeling a bit better for the last few days but now today im really worrying again.

Im worrying because i have noticed more bruises on my legs than i usually get and i have ( sorry... a really heavy period which is not ususal for me. I have a heavy head cold too just now and now am really freaking out that i have a low platelet count.

I read somewhere that this happens when a person with hiv is becoming symptomatic and its scaring me because I dont trust my five negative hiv test results, partly because i have a weird lump in my cheek which i read happens with hiv and largely because i have GAD and obsessive probs.

I wondered if anyone could reassure me that its okay if i did have lower platelets and its okay to trust the results. I really dont want to go off on one again....i cant bare the anxiety when i do.

I also read that the tests they use now are really accurate and that they use the same tests all over the world because they work for all the different subtypes of hiv.......can anyone reassure me that this is true?

Sorry to be a pain.....

Thanks

Lisa
xxxxx

[rebeccad]

hi Lisa deep down you do know that you are fine and that its not a coincidence that 5 tests have been negative. It is just they way you are feeling that is blocking all rational thoughts. If you have a cold then you are going to feel under the weather anyway. If the tests were not accurate what would be the point in doing them? and also they would have to tell you that they were not accurate. Are you still receiving cbt? Also if you did have hiv surely your child or partner would also have it right? You have got the advantage of have so many tests 1 of them would have shown up by now

Hope you feeling better soon xx

[rebeccad]

also can i just say that i have a wierd lump on the inside of my cheek but it totally doesnt even bother me, (not yet anyway)!!xxxxxxxxxxxxxx

[meg86]

Hey Lisa, i know how you feel but i am 100% positive that you dont have HIV, i actually believe the more you read up about symptoms the more you will find.

I have had various different health obsessions and everytime i thought i had something i had pretty much all the symptoms that go with it.

I believe anxiety is that powerful that it can effect your body like this.

You dont have HIV sweetie trust me!! and i know what its like to get locked on your head like this i am going through it myself.

Your anxiety is making you irrational, you really need to recognise it and beleive in it, you dont have HIV you have anxiety and there are 100s of people that think the same as you and we all have anxiety nothing else xx

[barbn]

Lisa - great advise so far! With five negative tests you do NOT have HIV! I know it isn't easy to get that through your head - it is the anxiety talking to you! The lump in your cheek cuold be almost anything...I wouldn't worry about it!

[Blot]

Hey Lisa, those HIV tests they do are so very advanced nowadays, & the fac that 5 results have been a resounding negative is great,great news - you are NOT HIV positive.Just rememebr that when we are run down after having some kind of illness, albeit a common head cold, our bodies take a while to settle again

[barbn]

You said it Blot - sometimes it takes 4 weeks for our bodies to totally recover from an illness and then slap anxiety on to the top of that and waaalaaa we have some type of disease! I know it seems funny to read, but I know it isn't - it is very serious to us. I always expect my body to bounce right on back the next day after I have been sick and when it doesn't, I think there is somethign else wrong. Go figure.....

[Stressed32]

Lisa, my sweet friend......u know better than this! U know that bruising is not a symptom of HIV. U also know that the lump on your cheek is not HIV...cause u dont have it!

[LisaLisa]

Thank you sooooooooooo much everyone....your replies mean so much.

Its amazing how lovely everyone is on this site....it really helps me deal with this anxiety

Thank you all again.

Lisa
xxxxx