Well after five years of panic attacks yesterday i was diagnoised with PTSD and everything fell into place, I spoke to the therapist for over an hour about my symptoms and she was shocked to hear that no one else had noticed it , she was shocked to the point that she was going to discuss her findings with my doctor! I felt so relieved. She said

If you imagine a draw full of socks all paired up neat and tidy,
something (in my case an event) comes along tips the drawer upside down on the floor and messes all the socks up.

She said the easiest thing to do is to throw all the socks back into the drawer after all none of the socks have been lost.

and that is excatly what has happened to me, something happened that muddled things up in my head, like the socks, i havent lost anything i just need to get the messy socks back out of the drawer and put them back into pairs again. Its going to take a while to get things back in order but everything i had and was before, is still there its just not neat and tidy at the moment.

It sounds abit corney but its given me hope...