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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jan 2004
    Location
    , , United Kingdom.
    Posts
    7

    Confused

    Hi there,

    im a new member, and still new to the whole OCD thing. i believe i have it, but my thoughts seem to be alot different from everyone elses. so im confused and worried.

    i dont find it necessary to wash my hands all the time, or make sure everything is in the right place constantly. etc. But i find myself focusing on things that i do not need to worry about. i tell myself time and time again, but the thoughts always come back to haunt me.

    im concerned that im not in love with my boyfriend of 3 years. he has been a god send to me, we have a great time (when im happy), he cares so much for me, and treats me like a princess. i enjoy his company and he has been so supportive throughout this whole ordeal. so WHY AM I WORRYING??? i dont understand! i dont want to leave him.

    i also question my sexuality all the time. i never even thought about it until i read a problem page about a woman who thought she mite be gay. and then BOOM, what if im gay, what if this what if that, and the thoughts wont leave my head. i dont even want that!

    i constantly question whether i find people attractive, and if i do then thats rubbish.

    im at my wits end.

    please help

    natalie xxx








  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jun 2003
    Location
    , , United Kingdom.
    Posts
    8,314
    Hi Natalie,

    There are a few common themes that thousands of people have with OCD like germs or safety rituals but everyone has something a bit different and thats totally fine.

    Please don't get hung up on a diagnosis. It doesn't really matter whether you are OCD or just anxiety ridden due to these thoughts.
    They are important to you and that is enough.

    The solution is exposure and changing these thoughts. It will take time.

    Initially , I would suggest you get a boook and spend time writing all this out - just for you . Write write write, It may take hours or minutes but write about it until you get totally fed up of the subjects.

    Then you need to try to distract yourself . Find something completely different that takes 100% of your concentration. Suddenly, you'll realize that you've not thought about it at all for a few minutes - hours .

    Once you can banish the thoughts then move on to trying to rationalize them . Take each one and examine it, go back to your writings and reread them (if you can )and write out the thought and weigh up its value in truth points. If it's not true make up a truer version and cross out the initial one and write the truer one beneath .

    Every time you then think the old thought visualize the sheet of paper with it crossed out and read the new one. Do this time and time again . Eventually it will sink in.

    You could also tape yourself saying your new thoughts and play it at bedtime .

    Good luck.





    Meg

    Watch your thoughts, they become your words...
    Watch your words, they become your actions... Watch your actions, they become your habits... Watch your habits, they become your character... Watch your character, it becomes your destiny...

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Jan 2004
    Location
    , , United Kingdom.
    Posts
    7
    Thankyou.

    I'll try that out for a while and c how it goes.

    This website is amazing!!!

    Love natalie xxx

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Nov 2003
    Posts
    229
    hi natalie

    welcome.

    i dont really know anything about OCD. But i do recommend talking to your boyfriend. Is he clingey? or is he really sweet? maybe you should write down eveything you dont like about him, like his habbits and screw them up or rip them up. that helps for me, it might not work for everyone but its also good for stress. go through your notes point by point and see what you dont like about them for example-

    --his nail biting--goes on carpet--sticks in foot--doesnt hoover it up.........like that.

    hugs Rachel xx

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Oct 2003
    Location
    , , United Kingdom.
    Posts
    478
    Hi Natalie

    I suffer from this and my doctor termed it 'instrusive thoughts' which is a type of OCD. I am going to CBT to try and help, I'll let you know how I get on.

    Emily

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Jan 2004
    Location
    , , United Kingdom.
    Posts
    7
    Hi Emily,

    Its good to know that im not alone. ive read some books about OCD and it doesn't appear to focus in so much on thoughts, more about compulsions. But these thoughts are so annoying! They really are quite distressing.

    I start seeing my counsellor tomorrow, went to doctors today and he told me turns out she does CBT! she also does hynotherapy which is a great thing for relaxation. so im feeling pleased.

    Natalie

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