pregnant and very scared..pls send some love my way

[peach]

hi everyone,

im well known on here for my tocophobia- severe....

and now ive gone and gotten myself pregnant....

i really want this baby, but am so terrifed of birth-day. i cant decide which is the best way to go for me that i will be able to cope with...

pls dont post horror stories here, it wont help me.....

i terminated the last pregnancy because of fear and i have been given a second chance here that i dont want to ruin...so pls, im asking for positive stories to help me get through this and be excited about having my dream of a beautiful baby......

also, im terrified of hospitals and needles!!!!! i know- doesnt help right...im such a pathetic excuse of a woman, but pls advise......i cant talk about this with my 'friends' because they already heckle me and put me down for being scared of pregnancy.........
im just about 6 weeks now...

[kazzie]

Congratulations Peach

Please dont worry you will be fine

Luv Kaz x x x

[mandyclare]

Hi Peach..... that is lovely news

I don't know anything about your particular phobia but all I can say as a mum of 3 is that pregnancy and birth are completely different to being in medical situations / hospital with other medical issues. You will be so focused on your baby and making sure it's healthy that hopefully it will distract you from some of your normal phobia problems. Look at it as an adventure with some obstacles that you have to overcome.. but keep in mind all the time .. that at the end of it you will have the most precious gift you will ever know, somebody you will love more than you could have ever thought possible.... your baby needs you to be strong and brave and you can be. Please feel free to pm me anytime you need to chat. You can do this.. .im sure you will be a wonderful mother.

mand xx

[Granny Primark]

Congratulations.
Like kazzie says you will be fine.
It isnt as bad a some people make out otherwise women wouldnt go on to have more babies.
I was at the birth of my grandaughter 2 years ago and it was the most amazing experience of my life. It hasnt put my daughter off wanting other children.
The thing thats putting my daughter off at the moment is that my darling little grandaughter is going through the "terrible 2" stage!

[maddie]

Hi there. Congratulations!

Do you have a good relationship with your GP and is there a midwife based at his practise? When I had my daughter, I never went to the hospital or to ante-natal classes. They dealt with everything for me at the surgery, except for one scan I went to the hospital for. That was no problem as there were no needles and it was exciting to say hello to my baby for the first time.

I was scared about giving birth, but by the time she was due I was tired of waddling about and ready for it to happen. When the contractions started, they took over and I didn't think about anything except getting her out. Having a baby does hurt, but your brain and body are made to deal with birth pains. Ask any Mum - 2 days later they've forgotten and will tell you it's all worth it.

Good luck!

[peach]

thanks so much for your replys...i will reread them whenever i start to freak out again....

i have ibs so im hoping i will be able to handle birth pain as im hoping i may be able to get through it without needles....??

i have been told those pains can be similar...maybe im just wishing?
a friend just had her first baby and she went through hell, so im really hoping that doesnt happen to me......im still not sleeping well as i keep waking up and freaking out and crying.....

im just trying to keep it together and trying not to think of what is unavoidabley coming up in 7 and a half months......

i cant decide which is the better option...ceaser or natural birth? natural i may be able to avoid needles and def cutting...but just how much pain can i handle before i start to go crazy???i dont want to have a panic attack in the middle of it...

ceaser i cant avoid the needle but it would be over in 20 mins? would i go crazy going in? would i go crazy waking up with my stomach cut?

both seem so scary to me i can hardly breathe.......
maddie, i dont have a gp...im always too scared to go to the docs...i do go, but weve moved recently...sigh....i will look for one now i guess...just going to imagine a healthy baby.....

mandyclare- i just love what you wrote....thankyou all for your very kind words, it means a lot to me!

[Angelai]

Hi Peach, congratulations!

First of all, you are NOT a pathetic excuse of a woman - you have a phobia

Second, I just wanted to share something - my son was born by ceasarean, under epidural. I PROMISE you I did not feel the needle, I didn't feel a thing. That was thanks to the copious amounts of gas and air I guess .

When the time comes, there will be other things to occupy your mind and you will be fine xxx

[Ruby94]

Awwh,

Congratulations, and dont worry about the birth-day there is going to be loads and loads of support for you, all your family and friends will be with you in this. What are you hopeing for?

Ive had a termination, i was too scared to go through with it aswell. Im studying to be a midwife im doing childcare and developement.

You'll be absoloutley fine i wish you the best of luck, not that you'll need it, big hugs Ruby xOx

P.s

Just a tip:
Theres no need to stay up all night worrying about this either hun, turn every negative thought into a positive, if your feeling scared just write your worries down and then read them then after put a 'So What' after each worry, it does help. I got it from cosmopolitan Any worries please contact me i will not mind at all i would love to help. x

[peach]

thanks so much angelai for your kind words. i really hope i dont feel a thing as well and im gonna have as much gas as they will give me- hope that helps.

ive decided not to read any horror stories, so im just reading the week by week growing of the baby

i also want to keep tests to a minimum - if they pick anything up in the scan then ill decide what to do then, so im trying not to worry about the 'what ifs'.
although i really do hope it will be a healthy baby.

ruby94- i am sort of hoping for a girl, just because of the dressups and i have lots of lovely things id love to pass on to her...but im also trying not to hope too much as i dont want to be disapointed if it does turn out to be a boy and to be honest as long as its healthy, i should just be grateful.

[lynn1960]

i dont know much about your phobia but am pleased with your news.yoy are not a pathetic excuse for a women you have a problem if there is anything that i can do to help please message me i had my daughter 23 years ago but would never be without her my thoughts and best wishes are with you in whatever you do